Workshop - Santa Ana, CA School – 1977 - Page 9 of 12

Note from proofreaders:  Marsha does the original transcribing from cassette tapes or CD’s and we do the final proofreading.  We strive to give as close a verbatim transcript as possible, so that this can be a companion to the audio files found in the “Links” section.  We work to retain Dr. Bob’s interesting vernacular.  If you knew the man, not correcting his grammar and laid back “Kentucky-ese” makes reading it sound like he’s actually talking.  He’d say “everone” for “everyone”; or “somewheres” instead of “somewhere”, and many more…all part of his dialect of which we’ve tried to remain true.  Notations have been added where there was audience (laughter), which was quite often.  He was a master at keeping the mood up! 
(Audience participation is contained in parenthesis. )
Any emphasized word is in italics.
[ Any clarifications for the reader in regards to Dr. Bob’s references, words, or actions have been italicized inside brackets. ]      

Continued from page 8:

(A normal progression from one to four, one to five, was that — when they came to you, was that normally in the course of one day, let's say?)

I’ll just say that in 35 or 40 minutes you can push it up there, but now I'll also tell you, it probably won't stay there very long unless you keep 'em around…from 30 minutes to an hour you can take a person from here to here,  just by leading it along and you got to be in front.  You can't just send 'em, you got to go with 'em; and also they will have a tendency to drop back down a little bit when you leave 'em alone.  Now if you keep 'em up three or four times, four or five times, they get so they kind of like that and stay up there; but at first it's just too much difficulty, you know.  Now…yes, Diane.

(Can this be like stages — look back on your life and see definite stages following these progressions?)

Oh, some people.  And some have stayed in the same place all their life.  But I would say most of us got tired of being down here in Fear and we went up to Resentment and then we wandered on up here, yes, and spent long periods.  And maybe some of 'em you stayed in for a long period of time and some were relatively short.  And sometimes you went back to a lower one at certain times, right?  But if you know what they are, you can change your mood with…been talkin' all week how you can change it from this one to this one, or you can change this into this by simply the way you act.  If you sit down and just fall apart and say there's no use in nothin'.  [In a pitiful voice]  “I've tried everything and it's worthless…” [His words become moans].  Pretty soon you can be down in these states and in a few days if you stayed there, you'd have all the physical symptoms that goes with it. 

And if you look at a group of people that’s sittin' in a health establishment, you will find that about 99% of 'em there are from here to here [Fear to Held Resentment].  These [Apathy] don't go because it’s no use.  The hell with a doctor, there's no use.  And this one [Anger] don't go because he says, "What will those bastards do for me?"  And he don't go until he is hauled into the emergency ward with a heart attack or somethin'.  But he don't go.  But your practice of…a physician's practice or any other health-delivery service…I believe that's the new polite term, “health-delivery service” — like you had a nice delivery man — is about 90% of ‘em in between here.  I'm talkin' about the sick ones, not the ones that get their fingers cut and legs broke, and etc.  But I'm talkin' about the ones that consistently make up the daily demand for services — about 90%.   And we used to have a little phrase that we referred to one of 'em as “wet man” and the other one as “dry man”. [He points to steps on the Tone Scale.] This one's wet [Fear]  and this one's dry [Held Resentment].  This one’s all full of water and pokin' out and this one's all dried up.  So you have wet man and dry man and that pretty well covers about how they…about 75, 80, 90 percent; and then there's a few people get scratched and hurt and broken toes and so forth.   The Apathetic ones don't come unless the family calls them in.  They never come under their own steam.  And the Angry one can hardly get there at all until he is in an emergency situation.  Time he gets to Boredom, he don't bother to come either.  And the Contentment one don't show up very much unless they're having a baby or somethin'; and Vital Interest has no truck to be there at all; no reason to be there.  And Enthusiastic people just…you can't catch them long enough to look after ‘em anyway.  They're on the go.  They're movin' on. 

Now you can be in any one of these states you wanna be and you can also…that is if you have enough interest in it to act upon it — not just wishing it and affirming it or whatever other methods one goes about gettin' things without effort.  What are some of the other methods you use besides affirmations and what?

(Science of Mind does a treatment.)

A treatment.  Somebody else can work on you.  And I can work on it or I could give it a little visual....

(Imagery?)

Imagery, is that what it is?  That's a good one — that really gets up there.  But the main thing is that you start acting on it and you decide, “I’m gonna get up and start doin’ it.  I'm gonna be that.”  Huh?

(Bob, would tooth decay be more of a disease falling under this category or would it be more of a physical —)

Well teeth would be physical.  I'm talkin’ about the physical things that goes with it.  A person with tooth decay would be anywheres from about here down, according to the extent of it. You got a whole slew of it, it'd be way down there.

(Oh, really.)

Yeah, you haven't got any tooth decay, do you? 

(No, I don’t.) 

Well, that's what…why bother.

(It's true, why bother?) 

You lose your teeth, you’re bitin’ gum.  That’s all that’s left.

(Is that from Anger down or Boredom?)

Boredom down.  The further down you went, probably the ones on the bottom wouldn't even have teeth to go have decay.   If they had been at it very long....

(What was that, Bob?)

I said they wouldn't even have teeth unless they carry ‘em in their pocket or somethin', but they wouldn't be having cavities in ‘em.  They wouldn't be having cavities in your teeth, the ones on the bottom too, if they had been there very long, ‘cause they've already all gone.  They just fall out.

(I have a question for the point.)

Yes, sir?

(It appears to me as if children do not seem to be in the boredom class for a very long period of time according to (unclear).   They should be coming along rather quickly.   In another words, in that age group are the most cavities and things of that nature appear...)

Kids live in about here, and here, and here.  [points to Fear, Held Resentment, and Anger]

(Really?)

Yeah.  It's terrible to be a kid.  I don't ever want to go through it again.  If you don’t believe it, live with 'em.  They're nice if you just see 'em with their mothers goin' somewheres, but live with 'em all day, you'll see what I mean.  They're mostly in those.

(Four through two.) 

Four, three and two.  That's about where they are and they get an awful lot of cavities, yeah.  If you can get 'em out of it, they quit havin 'em.

(Oh, my God.)  (She just made the comment that our teeth had been filled by the time we were eight, nine years old.)

That's probably right; four, three, two. It's tough to be a kid.  No wonder you get ticked off.  All you ever see is behinds up over your head.

(laughter) 

(But aren't there distinct times when children were prone to caries than other times?)

At what?

(At certain times.)

Oh, sure, there’s times they go further down the scale than others and then they'll go back up a little bit, but they wander around.  Very few people ever get up to this levels over here without conscious attention and effort.  It's not just somethin' that somebody falls into, really.  Contentment is high as they ever get.  Huh?

(Is it possible to create an environment of a temporary situation for a child of — intermittently — that could possibly give him a sense that there is another level?)

I would like to experiment with it.  If somebody will provide me a facility, I’ll run the experiment.

(I'll talk to you about it later.)

Ok, dear.   I've been trying to talk people into providing me a…I have a pretty fair idea of what would be at least a worth one.  I think it would have to be somewhat a rural or semi-rural setting.

(Rural?  Does it have to be an everyday thing?)

Yeah, I'd want 'em there all the time…

(Oh.)

...for several days 'cause you’re not gonna get anything…if I have 'em for an hour a day and you turn him loose and let him go back with his peers that's all down in the dumpies, and his parents are down in the dumpies, and gritchin' at him and, you know. It's like a little kid told me one day.  I asked him what his name was and he said, "It's Charlie Don't."  (laughter)  So I kept wondering about this and finally I understood.  Everything anybody said to him was, "Charlie don't."  "Charlie don't do that."  "Charlie don't do this."  "Charlie don't step there."  "Charlie don't eat like that."  "Charlie don't slam the door."  "Charlie don't ride your bicycle on the sidewalk."  "Charlie don't get your bike in the street."  So he felt his name was Charlie Don't.  Yes, dear?

(Bob, this one never did have any difficulty with anything as a child, but....)

Honey, that was so long ago, you and I don't really remember that.

(You didn't let me tell you all of it.)

Ok, I'm goin' to.

(Every time someone wanted this one to do something that I didn't want do, I just immediately laid down on the floor and pulled out some of my beautiful black, curly hair that they all adored and showed it to them.  And then they — I had them immediately under control.)

You were their hair puller.

(I never had a child's disease.  I never had bad teeth.  I never had anything.)

You worked all your aggressions off pullin’ your hair out.)

(Yes, and I controlled them.)

Right, and made ‘em toe the line.  All you had to do was haul a handful of hair out.  Well, that'll work your aggressions off, haul your hair out. 

(Bob, they did an experiment in Israel in the kibbutzim, and as you say no child was sick, no cavities, no nothing.)

Mm-hmm, cause they kept 'em by themselves.  They weren't with grown people.

(That's right.)

Right.

(And they never got sick.)

If you have to put up with grown people when you're a kid it's just impossible, you know.  It's just too wide a variation.  Those big ones are tryin’ to make you do it because they're bigger than you are.  And old Vi got an upper hand on 'em.  She hauled hair out and scared 'em with it 'cause they was afraid she'd pull it all out if they…that right? 

(Uh-huh.  And my mother used to weep.  I'd go and show her, see — when you tell me not to do something — so I'd just pull a hair out, and I'd go and show her, see; and then she'd weep and I had her.)

You had her right where she belonged.

(Right.)

Shame you lost that talent as the years went on. (Laughter)

(I'm glad I did, I still have my hair!)

Yeah, but you really can't make everybody do everything you want these days – just almost, is that right?

(Well, no, I don't even do that anymore.)

It’s hardly worth botherin’ with.

(I got past that — went the other way.) 

Ok? Yes, Judy?

(Why did you call it “sudden healing” when you go up to vital interest?)

Well, that's what…I said some people called it that.  I did not.  I knew what I was talking about.  But if you take a person there, all the symptoms disappear by the time you get up here.  They really do.  All of 'em, Jean. 

(But.)

But.  Now you could run back down the hill quick as you want to afterwards, yes. 

(Right.)

‘Cause after all, we're not gonna give up all of our symptoms all that easy with all the effort I went to get 'em, and look how valuable they are.  They're like Vi's hair pullin', you know.  After all, I know an old lady that just has a heart-sinking spell and makes the kids toe the line to who you thought it and they're 55 years old now; and she's still doin' it.  And you don't think she's gonna give that up do you, Judy?  I might make her forget about it for 30 minutes, but she would remember that these kids are liable to go off and do something they want to do and not ask me unless I had a sinking spell.

(Mm-hmm.)

They've had to rush her to the hospital many times.  Course nobody finds anything wrong with her over there, but she has the kids in a dizzy.  You know somebody like that.

(Who?)

Yeah, you do.

(I suppose.   Do you have someone specific in mind?)

Well, no, I was just looking at a picture you had runnin’ by there; and you know somebody lays that out.

(Right.)

Ok, question?  Comment?  Now I didn't say it was here, did I?  I said they wouldn't have any of the symptoms that was here when they got to here.  And I don't care, it only takes 30 minutes.  One time I got to be kind of smarty.  I was workin’ down on the gulf coast in Gulfport, Mississippi.  And I got workin' with somethin'.  I found out I'll take people up this real fast.  So in one week, there was a lady who had had polio when she was a child and couldn't speak very well, you know.  Very decided [He growls in demonstration] effort tryin’ to talk.  And so when I decided to run my little experiment, she happened to be the first one showed up.  So in 30 minutes she walked out of the place able to talk as good as you can or you can or anybody else.  Then she went home and told her family about it, of course, and that was the wrong thing to do.  And then the neighbors heard about it and now they all come and said, “What did the man do?”  Well, you know it sounds pretty stupid to say we just talked a while, huh?  Now if she could'a said, well, he sung a song, said a prayer, did a dance or we performed a dramatic operation on me or some other dramatic thing, you know — reached down my throat and pulled out some bunch of stuff and threw it away and it didn't hurt or all this — then you could have had somethin’ dramatic to tell the neighbors.  But she didn't have a thing in the world to tell 'em.  So she had to leave town, ‘cause she was just too embarrassed to face all these people.  It looked to all them like you've been puttin' this on for years, because obviously nothin' could be all right this drastic in one afternoon, huh?  So she had to leave town.  She come by and said, “It's just too embarrassing to stay here, but it looks like I've been goldbrickin' or somethin' and I can't tell 'em what we did.  All I know is I come in here and talked to you a little while.  I really wasn't intendin’ to talk to you about my condition.  All I was gonna do is sell you somethin'.”  And her terrible impediment that she had was her best sales pitch, you see.  And I told her I didn't want what she had to offer to sell, but I'd give her somethin' while she was there, and she left [unclear].

And then the next two or three days, the next one that came in presented it for my deal was an old man who was paralyzed from his waist down.  He'd been sittin' in a wheel chair three and a half years.  So I happened to go by the house where he lived.  I felt it would have been easier to go by there 'cause it was on the way where I was goin'.  So I went in and talked to a man in a wheel chair and in about 40 minutes, he walked out the back door of the house and one of his grandkids come runnin', hollerin’, “Grandpa, you can't walk!”  And he left town the next mornin', too, because he couldn't take it because they said, "Well, what did the man do?"   "Well, he just came in the living room and we sat there and talked a few minutes."  And you know, no song singin’, no prayer meetins’, no drums beatin', no tambourines, no trans states or anything.  You just can't explain these things.  And the third one was a blind man.  Yes, honey?

(Go ahead.)

The blind man came in and told all about his sad state.  He didn't come see me.  He came to see a man I was workin' with, and the man who was workin' with him give him to me.  So we talked with him for a while and pretty soon, he picked up a book on my desk and he said, "That says ‘Synopsis of Physiology’ on there."  I said, “Yeah, that’s what it says.”  He opened up the book and read about the paragraph and threw it down and called me a dirty name and left.  Now he came in and said he'd been totally blind for 17 years; but by observing him, I asked him somethin' like, “Who you been hatin’ so hard?”  Well, he told me, and why.  The so-and-so and so- and-so over…the next door neighbor who had been flirtin' with his wife through the back door some way or over several years; and he had hated this man with a passion.  And he wanted to kill him and he knew if he ever saw him again, he would kill him.  And so it was a whole lot better not to even see him than it is to kill somebody, you know, somethin' like that.  But at any rate, he had a little colored man, boy, who went with him everywheres and held his arm and lead him.  And he was waitin' out in the hall.  This is several years ago.  Black guys didn’t come in quite up to his offices.  They wait outside.

(Especially not in Gulfport.)

Not in Gulfport, Mississippi for sure and certain.  So when the guy went out, the little colored guy jumped up to grab his arm to lead him like he always did, and he said, “Get away, I don't need you.”  And he left town the next day.  So I decided we better not do this sudden stuff anymore or pretty soon there wouldn't be anybody in town, so I quit it.  Really, it's not being nice to people to give 'em the ‘suddens’ as much as you might think it would be.  And I've diligently been careful not to do that sudden bit anymore.  But it is simple.  All I did was get 'em where they were on here, and just keep goin' with 'em til they got to here and they didn't have any symptoms.  But I recognized very rapidly, I wasn't doin' anybody any great favors.  You know it’s quite an effort to have to get up and move yourself out of town and find you a whole new area to live and everything.  Yes, Jean?

(Well, once they would, say, like leave town or whatever, would not the fear that might come on them with this leaving —)

I didn't chase 'em down.  All I was interested in was runnin' my little experiment, and I found out it worked, hon. 

(Well, would it bring back say the blindness ....)

I don't think so.  I don't think so, dear.  It might do somethin’ else to themselves, but not that same one.  They wouldn’t run the same trip again, you know.  They been there.

(You say you find out where they are and then take them up to Vital Interest.)

Well, I just started…it's easy to see where they are a few minutes…I’ve been playing with this a little while.

(Ok.  And how is it you take them up there?)

Well, I just talk to people a little bit and, you know, and make various statements and there's no set technique.  I just know where I'm goin’.  You see, I don't know if you ask me, "Well, Bob, how do you pick up one foot and get it in front of the other and not fall down to get out the door."  I don't know, I just get up there.  I know what I'm gonna do, and so anybody could do it because essentially it’s just gettin' the conversation with the person.  You have to accept them as they are, where they are, and if you know where you're gonna be up here, they can't keep from goin' with you.  As I said, it’s highly contagious to be up here.  And you can get 'em up there.  Sure you…I wouldn't say there's any technique ‘cause if I laid a technique somebody would want to do it exactly that way.  When you see what it is you want to do, it's fairly easy to do it.  It's really no big old effort to struggle in that, ‘cause everyone of  'em was different.  All three of these that I worked with…and I did this in a week, and I haven't done it anymore ‘cause I don't want to put people in a position have to leave town.  You'll leave town?  Ok, we'll start on you.  (laughter)  The old man, huh?   (Everybody talks and laughs)    What’ll your doctor think if you don't show up?

(That’s his problem.)

What, dear?

(You mentioned earlier eastern religions, you know, that some of them that have come over here have — there's one — and I know several people in one of those — matter of fact I used to belong to it.  Buddhists, you know, when they chant a certain mantra over and over again, and I don't know if I was fooling myself or something, but I actually saw — in relationship to this, I saw people that, like were cured of things and who definitely raised their mood or seemingly their Tone Scale.  And could you sort of explain or comment on how that would happen if — you know, obviously something has happened.)

Well, if you got your mind off of how pathetic…I can hardly imagine gettin' an apathetic person to start chantin'.  It’s a little beyond my capability of recallin’ into my head.

(Uh-huh.)

Now I could see how you might get a Resentment or an Anger and a Boredom started, maybe even Fear.  But I just can't imagine a good apathetic person chantin’.  They would tell you, “Bleah!”   But if you did, you would be off for, at least temporary, whatever your fear or resentment or anger was because you are totally distracted by payin’ attention to your mantra, is that right? 

(Uh-huh.)

And you'd have to raise a little bit.  I don't know how far, but you'd have to raise.  If you raised even one notch, you would have an entirely different situation than you was in the other one.  Now you see, I've also seen people go from Anger to Fear and everybody said how much better they were because they was easier to get along with.  Ok?

(Mm-hmm.)

(Also with chanting, there's an effort to chant enthusiastically, in the act —)

Oh, yeah.  Sure, it’s an act.  So you're puttin' on an act of being very holy, righteous, spiritual, very enthusiastic ....)

(No, what I’m saying is, through the act you actually —)

And by the same token, if you took up the martial arts and diligently worked on it, you have to go up the Tone Scale. 

(Mm-hmm.)

(What about the —)

How about you taking up Judo? 

(Who me?  I don't want to.)

Why?

(Because it’s not interesting.)

Sounds like too much effort, huh?  Be easier to philosophize. 

(The martial arts would be almost like, in any kind of form, you make a physical exertion then, wouldn't it?)

You would have to put out an act and you got to put on an act to get there and you get raised up to where you're acting like you're indestructible and infallible, aren't you?

(Oh, I was just — like, yeah.  What about people, you know, like the chant — that really chant for other people — suppose that something is wrong, like they have cancer or they have whatever.  Would that — and this is a question — would that be equivalent like to making up the mind for somebody else?)

Well, if that's what they were doin' it for, yes.  And if you get yourself chanted enough, then you got yourself in an adequate enough state, you could say whatever you wanted to say and it'd probably be true in that.

(Ok, thank you.)

Yes?

(The people we were just talking about that you raised in this thing, that was in a specific area. Have you rushed anybody through the overall area up to a certain point?)

You mean…in a specific area of what?

(Like the man who couldn't see.  We in class are here for various reasons, and various —)

Yeah, and we have managed ever now and then to give people a lift a notch or two; I sometimes have to really push, but most the time we can get you up a notch or two, don’t we?

(Have you worked with a task or a recovery rate, or where ever you want to put it on a higher degree, and been able to maintain it with a group?)

No, not with a group because there's usually a few in there that didn't go along.

(Not in a group — I didn't mean a group like this.  But I mean a group of individuals.)

No, I never tried to take more than one at a time.  I always figure I got to keep my attention on that one and keep them goin' as far as this, because it's an interplay between the two of you.  And he's trying to knock you down.  He's tryin' to sell you on how miserable it is and you're tryin' to sell him somethin' else; it’s succeedin’ in sales and I'm a better salesman than he is.  That's all.   Ok? 

(You were gonna talk this afternoon about making up your mind.)

That's what somebody told me I was gonna do.

(Somebody asked you and you said, “I'll talk about that this afternoon.”)

And we’ll do it…so you make a mind.  Is that what you're gonna do now then, Sarah, is to have me talkin’ about makin’ up the mind?

(Yeah, good.)

Well, now we've talked about it all week under another terminology.  When you want something, you see what it is you want; so the process of makin’ up the mind is to make one, not have two out there.  So what do I want?  [he writes it on the board]  Now as long I can't get past that, what do I want…Well now, if I say, “What I want is to be safe and at the same time have adventure.  But I want an adventurous life, but I want to be safe.”  Now we haven't gotten past what do I want.  You can't come up with one thing, is that right?

(Mm-hmm.)

Now if I could come up with one thing…it’s got to be singular.  You can't make up your mind to two.  That book you had me workin’ on last night said, "A double-minded man need expect nothing,” because he's unstable in all of his ways.  He can't make up his mind whether he wants to be safe or have an adventure.  Mmm?  You can't have both.  You can't always have your way and control people and feel good at the same time 'cause you got to be sick most of the time in order to control 'em.  Is that right?  So you go back and forth.  So when you can get so you can answer this…now this is why we talked about that then we can have a whole new purpose, 'cause the Four Dual Basic Urges totally precludes you comin’ to a single conclusion; and it precludes it.  The Four Dual Basic Urges will have so many sides that you cannot come to sayin’ exactly, “What do I want?” while that's your purpose of livin’.  So we've talked a bit all this week about possible finding a new purpose of livin’.  We said at least we could be a good guest here, huh?  Now there's no two ways that.  Or if I came up with this.  Then the next question is:  “How would I act if I already had this?” [he writes this next question on the board]    And then I'm gonna start acting that way and then I would feel that way.  And so then the person would be having the exact situation:  You have made up your mind, and when it's made up it is realized. 

In certain literature, the ability to make up the mind is called “faith”.  Now the thing that obstructs makin' up the mind is having two things that you wanna go at the same time.  “I want to make him do what I want to do, but I don't want to have any fights.”  Well?  Hmm?  “I want to keep my money in the bank, but I want to buy a new car.”  “I want to have a wonderful business that is making beaucoup loot, but I don't want to be tied down.”  Now you can't make up your mind on those because you're sittin’ on there…which way do you want to go, but you can't go both ways because you've made it impossible situation.  You put a goose in a bottle before you started, right?  A goose in the bottle before you started.  Yes, dear?

(I just read something somewhere just recently that was saying if you change the "but" to "and" —)

You can have 'em both, one now and one then.  I have everything; a little of it now and all of it then. 

(Oh.) (laughter) 

So I can have companionship today, and I can have my fight then, ok?  You can have your wonderful business that makes all the money now, and not being tied down then, that right?  So you have to also create you a then to have the ‘and then’.  ‘Cause you can't have ‘em both at the same time.  You can't stand up and sit down.  Now I can sit down now and stand up then, huh?  But I can't stand up and sit down at the same time.  Correct?  Simple. Ok?  Yeah, dear?

(Does that mean like puttin' the ‘then’ as an aim for the future?  Is that an aim?)

It was just to keep from havin’ to look at things.  Somebody who didn't know anything else said, “Instead of putting the ‘but’ there, put an ‘and’”.

(I see.  Got it. Thank you.)

Then comes the big decision as to which one I'm gonna have now and which one then; and we're tied up anyway.

(Oh, ok.)

“I can't decide whether to have A now and B then, or to have B now and A then.  So I want to be sure and do the right thing and get 'em in the proper sequence and I'm just as confused and aggravated as I was before.”  Yes, dear?

(It seems to me if you just do one of ‘em, and if you don't like it you can go back and do the other one, and you spend a lot less time and energy than when you're stuck in the indecision.)

Well, I find that I can just take one by whim and do that and who knows, I may never even think about the other one again.  I just do things by whim anyway.  That's all the evidence you got.

(What if you took something like, you know, I don't want to spend the money in the bank and, you know, but I want a new car, and just said, ”What I do want is a car to go get it.”) (laughter)

Good thing some of us work.  (laughter)  It sure is wonderful that some of us get up in the mornin' and go to work, that's all I can say.

(I'm just saying ‘what if’.)

Huh?

(I'm just saying — putting a ‘what if’ there.)

Well, you can ‘what if’ it all day, but…so wish in one hand and spit in the other and see which one gets full between us, huh?  Ok?  Comment?  Point? 

Well, let's call it a day. 

(Ok.) 

It's quarter to three, we started at 1:30.

[Beginning the next day of the workshop.]

We will start this morning and it seems that the word for today is "demon behavior".  So we will look at the demons inasmuch as I hear an awful lot of demons talkin'.  I'm well acquainted with 'em.  So we will draw a Picture of Man to somewhat the point. [He begins drawing on the board.]  And as all of you know, we have the Physical Body, Awareness, and X, and that you exist in an Environment, and from the Environment you receive an Impression. [See: http://www.marshasummers.com/innerman/pictureofman.htm]  [or a video at: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MjvbTGpXYzM ]  You have a feeling about that Impression that goes to X.  X sends the message to the Physical Body to carry out the appropriate action for that information it received by this feeling.  So this is the information X receives, which is your feeling.  And this is the Impression from the Environment.  Now of course, it’s subject to interpretation when it gets here and that's what makes the feeling.  And the feeling is a neuroendocrine impulse to the body to carry out the appropriate action.  And that goes over and over and over and over and over; that's one endless cycle.  Yes, dear?

(Excuse me, what did you say about the impressions from the environment?)

You receive an impression and of course, it's subject to interpretation.  Now we're going to take a minute to look at how it's interpreted.  So the first decision which became a not-I…in fact the boss not-I.

(The boss not-I?)

Yeah, he's the boss of all not-I’s, was the ideal maker.  He's the ideal maker 'cause he said that the whole purpose of living was to be non-disturbed by gaining pleasure and comfort and escaping pain; gaining attention and escaping being ignored or rejected; and to gain approval and to avoid all disapproval; and to be important and to escape all sense of inferiority.  So that's the “master”.  The boss not-I is the ideal maker.  Now he continually sets up ideals.  This is his method of workin’ that he says what ought to be, what should be, about a hundred times a day to you, does he not, you know?  He tells you, “You ought to be this, you ought to be skinny, you ought to be like people, you ought to feel better than you do, you ought to be makin' more money than you do and that other people ought to treat you better than they do.  And that without any effort on your part, people ought to do what you want 'em to do.  They know what's right, but they go on and do wrong anyway,” hmm?

(How'd you know that?)  (Laughter)

I've been followin’ you at night.  I've been pursuin’ you at night.  So this is the “master not-I.”  Now he has a whole bunch of kids that work for him.  The first method that he set out…the first assistant not-I he had was a complainer.  Now this little guy comes along and complains because the ideal is not achieved, complains because the ideal is not there; but it should be, understand.  Not, but should be.  ‘Cause the boss said it should be, and this one complains because it's not.  Now frequently through the day, you hear complainin' comin' out of here.  Now most of us don't listen to what comes out of this voice.  We think we know all about that.  Did you ever notice that? You think you know what you're saying; but the fun starts when you start listening to it, without judging it or without condemning it; without approving or condemnation.  It just simply is comin' out; and you will hear the tremendous amount of this one talkin’ about what should be?  That's not you at all.  And you also hear a certain amount of complaining comin' out.  Did you ever hear any complainin’ comin’ out of you?

(Oh, yeah.)

But that wasn't you.  That was a not-I.  And a not-I you're not responsible for, but you don't have to put any value on what it says. 

Now the second one that the ideal maker, the “Boss”, set up to assist him, a little sub-demon, was the sticker-up-for-rights; Stickin’ up for Rights.  So that's what he does all the time is stick up for rights.   [He writes each word on the board.]  Now it is most interesting to consider our rights.  You have a certain amount of rights that need to be recognized do you not, Cici?

(Yes.)

Where'd you get 'em?

(Well, I'm entitled to them.)

That's right, that's what I said.  Rights are what I’m entitled to, entitlements.  Means the same thing.  How did you get to be entitled to them if I may ask, little lady?

(Well, I was told that I was entitled to them.)

You heard that from Dr. Ben Told; from the ideal maker, right?  (Laughter)

(Right.)

Dr. Ben Told told you, you had lots of rights and that if you didn't stick up for 'em, nobody else was going to.  Is that about the way you heard it?

(That's right.)

And you assumed that that was true and been stickin’ up for your rights ever since.

(Right.)

Now I want to ask a simple question.  Did you arrive in this big party the same way I did; broke, helpless, naked, without any funds, didn't understand the language?  And you were provided from the moment you arrived with food, clothing, shelter, transportation, some servants to look after you.

(Yes, true.)

Where did you get your rights out of that?  It looks to me like as far as the rest of the people that's here, you were an intruder, and an uninvited one at that, by them.  That correct?  So do you have any rights or have you been extended a great number of privileges?  Hmm?

(I guess it's privileges.)

And because you had…You guess?

(It's privileges alright.)

And most of us have a given privilege given to us several days in a row, we begin to feel entitled to it.  It’s our right, hmm?  If you meet the same wino character on the corner every Saturday and give him two dollars and the third Saturday…you do this for three weeks in a row.  You go down just to be a good soul, you give him two bucks every Saturday morning.  The fourth Saturday he'll be standin' there waitin' and if you don't show up, you have mistreated him because he was entitled to it by then, huh?  Now do you have any rights, or do you have a lot of privilege which you have mistaken for rights and started stickin' up for 'em, which is the most efficient way known to lose your privileges.  Hmm?

(Yes.  I have privileges.)

And you mistook ‘em for rights and started stickin' up for 'em and that's the best known method of losin' em.  Hmm?  You've lost a lot of privileges in your life, haven't you, that you had before.  You see that's the one advantage of bein' a good guest, you're not losin’ your privileges.  But you know it’s a privilege; you have absolutely no rights.  But the not-I continually tells you, [He talks in a belligerent tone.]  “You have a right not to be treated that way.  You have a right to have anything you want, when you want it.  You have a right to be treated like you wanted to.  And you don't have to tell 'em what you want because they're all mind readers and should know it.”  That right? 

(Mm-hmm.)

No kiddin’ around.  They should be mind readers and know exactly what you want, hmm?

(Right.)

That right, Sir?

(Always.)

They should know what you want.  After all it’s only what's right and proper, isn't it?

(And if they cared, they'd know.)

Yeah, if they care.  They already know, but they just don't care.

(They don't care, that's right.)

Now this is not-I talk.  This is the way the demon keeps you in a turmoil mornin', noon and night.  Now the first and only thing it has to do is set up an ideal of how things ought to be, and you just look around and you know, “This world is goin’ to hell with its back broke; and I'm in a worse shape because, you know, it's just terrible what all's goin' on, isn't it?”

(Mm-hmm.)

And you're entitled to be happy, aren't you?  With no effort on your part?

(That's right.)

After all you're a very special creature and you have lots of rights.  Now I'm talkin' for the not I's.  I'm only sayin’ it out loud.  You've all listened to it a thousand times, but they told you, you were thinking it.  You aren't, you're feeling it.  You see, you only feel things that are exterior to you.  Did you ever notice that?  You eat food that agrees with you and you don't even know anything about havin’ a stomach or a digestive system at all, do you?  Hmm?

(That’s right.)

But you eat some foreign material, like a bunch of little bacteria or some indigestible product, and you have bellyache, don't you? 

(Uh-huh.)

So you only feel things that don't belong there.  So people run along and say, "Well, I'm just livin' by my feelings."  They're not your feelings at all.  That’s the demon trying to control you and destroy your very existence, because otherwise you wouldn't feel ‘em.  You never have a discomfort or pain or anything as long as it’s your feeling, long as what's going on… You feel your heart beatin’?  Take a powerful drug and you can feel it beat all over the place. Plup, plup, plup, plup.  Get yourself all excited with a not-I and you hear your heart poundin’ and beatin' til you think everbody down the street must be listenin’ to it.  Ever had your heart run crazy?

(Mm-hmm.)

But only you've seen it was a little not-I you listened to and he cranks up the old ticker and it runs like fury.  And he says, "See, you're havin' a heart attack." 

Now the next little assistant that he put on was the “Pleaser”.  Now you don't want to please, but he says, “We must or we'll get hurt.  We'll get hurt if we don't please.”  You see we're really not interested in pleasin’ anybody for the sake of pleasin’  ‘em...   [End of CD 19]

Santa Ana School – CD 20

... and said, [In a whiny voice] "We didn't get to do what we wanted to.  Why should they have what they want?  Why should I please them?  Why can't I have what I want?”  Did you ever hear that?

(Absolutely.)

Those are demons.  You see, I'm playin’ the role of the demons this time.  I know how they function because I'm well acquainted with 'em.  I have a hot line straight into hell.  In fact I think I must have helped train some of 'em. 

Now the fourth one he put up was — this master boss not-I — in order to be able to take over this…now what they want to do is take over this organism and own it and run it.  Because the only way they can survive is to have chaos goin’ because that's what they eat and thrive on is human misery.  They can't survive on you feelin' good and goin’ on about your business.  So they want to take this over, like fifth columnists want to take over a country, usurpers of the power of the legitimate, shall we say, government.  So the fourth one here came up and said, "Now what you gotta do in order to get along in this world is believe and do as you are told by your authorities."  Now he's a quoter.  That's his function in existence is to quote an authority to you at the most unexpected moments.  Yes, Judy?

(Why did you number it that way, like one, two, four, three?)

You want me to number 'em some other way?  I numbered one, two, three, four.  It’s a straight sequence, honey.  That's the way they taught me to count.

(No, I mean why didn’t you put three next to two?  Is there a reason?)

For what?

(Not putting three next to one.)  (laughter)

That's clear across the board.  You see, you got a battleground over here divided up into parties so you'll really be torn up.  This bunch don't like this bunch.  You see the boss is so sure of himself that he wants to have chaos that he puts one bunch against the other bunch, so you will be the battlefield.  Then your only existence is to listen to these cats.  So the fourth one says, now you gotta believe as you do, and so you run along here, and one day you go out to do somethin’ you want to do.  And one of 'em jumps up and says, “All you ever do, is do what you want to do.  You have no consideration for other people whatsoever!”  Then you feel, “Oh, my goodness, I'm a bad person,” you know… that's what he wants.  He wants to make you feel terrible.  And then if you get down and try to consider other people, the other one jumps up and says, “You're doin' that for the wrong reason.  You’re just doin’ it so your revenue won’t hurt.  Ever hear that one?

(Yes, Sir.)

He's well entrenched.

(Yes, Sir.)

See I taught these kids everything they know, so I'm layin' it out for you.  So now all this goes on and you constantly have this chaos.  This one fights this one, and this one fights this one, Judy. 

(Oh, yeah.  I see.)

You see this one counteracts everything that says.  [pointing to the board]  He makes a "Yes, but" out of it.  And everything this one does, this one makes a "Yes, but" out of it.  So there is a little voice in there that accuses you constantly of not doing the right thing, doesn't it?  Hmm?

(Yes.)

It says, “If you would have done the right thing, you wouldn't have drank that damn Tab and make your body hold a lot of water.  But you had to please your taste all the time.”  That's this quarter over here.  And this one says, “Well at least I can have somethin’!  I gave up sugar, do I have to give up everything?”  You ever hear 'em?

(Yes.)

You're well acquainted with it.  Ok.  So the tactics of these is to divide and conquer, and they give you a tremendous lot, if you accept them, of unpleasant feelings.  Now after they got this goin' for quite a while, the boss says, “Well, I'm gonna put another guy in here and I'm gonna get ‘em “confused”.  I'm gonna take this over and the way to do it is to have a lot of internal dissension.  I'm gonna have all kinds of divisions, you see.  If I can get a dozen different kinds of minorities all stickin' up for their rights, and I can divide people into men and women and have women lookin' to be liberated from men and men wonderin’ how they're gonna protect themselves from women.  And I'm gonna have the blacks lookin' as to how they can get more advantages and not have to pay for it.  And I'm gonna have the Chicanos to have a demand.  I'm gonna have the Indians demand that they have total sovereignty over this.”  We can have a hell of a chaos, is that right?  “I'm gonna have labor against management.  And I'm gonna have the unemployed versus the employing, and I'm gonna have coal opposing oil.  I'm gonna have oil opposing uranium, and we're gonna have us a mess that won't quit.”  And we're gonna have utter chaos because, you see, the way to win is to divide into as many pieces as you can, and have everyone stickin' up for their rights and blamin' the other one, hmm?

(Mm-hmm.)

And doesn't this go on in your head constantly?  So this one says, “Now what you gotta do is be different.”  So this is ole “be different.”  And he tells you over and over that you're bad, and that if you would only do so-and-so, you'd be different.  And everything would be lovely if you'd only lose 10 pounds, hmm?

(Fifteen.)

Fifteen.  (laughter)  When you lost fifteen, he said, “You look haggard.  You're weak, you need some vitamins and some high protein and you got to have a little fuel in your body in order to run it,” huh?  And then he says, “If you go out and do something that you want to do, why you're just being selfish.”  You ever heard that one holler at you?  And if you go down and buy something that you want in the store, it says, “Where are you gonna get the rent money?”

(Umm…)  (laughter)

You must be well-acquainted with him.  (laughter)  So these demons, you see, run around and then when all else fails, they will say, “Are you sure you're loved?  Are you sure your husband loves you?  Are you sure your boyfriend loves you?  Are you sure your wife loves you?  Do your children love you, or do they just take advantage of you?”

(Right.)

Right.  “They just look at me as an endless source of supply for them so they can goof off and they want us to make the money,” hmm?  So now what you really do is ought to be different.  Now if you feel…if one says, “Well, you just let people walk over all your life.  You should be assertive and tell the bastards off.”  Then the other one says, “You're gonna get your head knocked off carrying on that foolishness.”  And then they tell you, “Now the best thing, if you were different, you could control all the circumstances that happen to you.  Now here you got behind a cop this mornin’ comin’ up the road.  If you'd a been livin’ right, there would have been no cops on the road and you could’ve rolled 80.  And you run into a parkin’ lot and some guy pulls into the parkin’ space you had your eye on just before you get there and you know it’s because you’ve been thinkin’ negative!”  (laughter)  And a car gets a thunk down in its innards somewheres and you wonder, “Did I bring this on?” says the little not-I.  He jumps up and says, "You brought this on!"  (more laughter)  Somebody comin' down the street hell bent for election and taps you on the back bumper, you know, while you're sittin', waitin' for a light turn green in an intersection, and you get a little whiplash.  And then you can talk forever, and all of your neighbors will tell you how you must have wanted that, because it’s really no such thing as an accident, you know!  And there wasn't no such thing as you not being totally in charge of the environment.  “That drunk drivin' that other car had nothing to do with it – you're in charge of him!  In fact of business, you're in charge of the whole world and what everybody does.  And if anything unpleasant happened to you, it was because you were a jerk!”  And so you get all shook up about this and then you say,  “Why, why, why, did this happen?” and they sit there in glee and say, "We got him!"  (laughter)  And they are having a banquet at your expense because they live on all this turmoil in human beings.  They could not survive and become strong on pleasant feelings.  They don't even like 'em.  They're like pigs – they like slop.  And so all day long, they come by and they say, "Well, let's get ole Jeannette, we got to have breakfast this mornin’."  So they go [Bob makes a sound like something moving fast.]…one of these nice little things that says, "Now you didn't sleep well enough last night, and it must have been because you were worried over something.  And you don't know what it was and so you've got a hidden complex.  (Laughter)  You've got to have a private appointment and talk it out and get this thing out here.”  And by that time, you're gettin' pretty upset, so they have breakfast pretty heavy.

And then they take off till about 10:00.  By this time, 10:30, they're ready for a midmorning snack.  So they say, “Well, let's bug her a little bit and get a snack.”  So they come in and say, "Are you sure you're doing the right thing?"  Hmm?  That seem vaguely familiar? 

(Right.) 

“Are you taking care of this work right?  Wouldn't it be better if you were doing something that was more creative and constructive than just this job you earn your daily bread with?  Now you want to do something creative…“  Oh yeah.  “And I don't know what's creative because [he makes unintelligible words to denote lots of inner talking],” and you feel pretty bad, and they have their midmorning snack.  They come back just before 12:00 and they really lay one out for you so they have a nice lunch.  Got to have a little misery, and human misery is their total food supply and they wax stronger and stronger and stronger with it, you see.  By the middle of the mornin’ after givin’ ‘em their breakfast and their midmorning snack, you're probably gettin' a little headachy or a little tired; and one of 'em jumps up, this guy that says you oughtta be different, and says, "You probably have low blood sugar or it could be… a brain tumor."  (laughter)  And you say, "Oh, my God!  Well, let's see, didn't Aunt Susie when she was dyin’ with cancer be talkin’ about how weak she was?  (laughter)  Wasn't it Aunt Susie that was always talkin’ about how weak she was and then she died with cancer?  It’s cancer that’s sappin’ my strength."  And so all of a sudden you're in good, and they have a beautiful French cuisine for lunch; the kind they like, which is human misery. 

And then they go away for a while in the afternoon, and go tell dirty stories to each other and drink a little beer.  And about three o'clock they say, "Time for an afternoon snack.  Let's go and get old Jeanette!"  One of 'em says, "What are we gonna do?"  "Well, why don't we blame something?"  So another little guy joins in the crowd, and he's the "blamer."  And he goes over and he says.  "Jeanette, the reason you are chubby (a little bit) is because the way your mother toilet trained you.  (Burst of laughter)  And you got that hate for her in there and you haven't gotten it out."  And you say, "Oh, my God, I wonder who I better go talk to about that?"  And, "I wonder why I don’t like men."  He says, "Probably the reason that you're afraid of men is that you're afraid you'll have to give something."  And so pretty soon you're in a turmoil as to what you're gonna have to do.  And he flips up and says, "Your ego's out of line, too.  You just got too much damn ego."  Oh, you feel so terrible, and they have their nice afternoon snack and a couple of extra beers, and then they take off till about six o’clock.  Now, they like to eat from six until midnight. (laughter)  Did you ever notice that about the time your day's work's done and you have nothin’ to do but sit around the house a little bit, that they really turn loose, hmm? 

(That’s right!)

And if you got somebody else in the house, they work on them, too.  And they tell you, “You gotta defend yourself!” you know, to stick up for your rights.  Here he says, [in an accusing voice]  “What have you done today?” He must be implying you haven't done a damn thing all day, while you've been here slavin’ your fingers to the bone over a hot stove and keepin' house and keepin' all this and lookin' after these kids; while he's been sittin' off with his durn white shirt on, sittin' in an office somewheres.  “He's not gonna talk to me like that!”  So now goes the big defense.  So we tell him off and he says, "I don't have to put up with that bitch’s talk."  And here he goes back the other way, huh?  And they have steak, potatoes, spaghetti, the whole works that they like for dinner, huh?  And they keep it up till midnight, right?

(Yup.)

And no matter what you do all evening, they make you go to bed with a headache, and feeling that you're probably the most mistreated female in all the world, hmm?  If you got a man, he's a dirty old B.  If you don't have one, you crawl into bed and, “Why didn't the good Lord provide me with a husband like he did all these other people!” or vice versa, you know.  Did you ever hear all those little kids talk all evenin’?  Anybody wants to talk…ever heard Mom?  Have you heard Mom, Arlene?  Have you?  Now you know what a not-I is, huh?

(Yes.)

And all the things that you ever get upset about is not you at all because you're an Awareness Function of X.  [He begins writing on the board as he talks.]  Now here is our little picture of man.  Here is the body.  Here's Awareness which is I with a line drawn under it – the real one,  that is, without all these intruders – and here's X.  So you see something out here and you say, "There's a loaf of bread and it looks like it'd be good."  X pours a little saliva in your mouth and you eat the bread, okay?  Simple: one, two, three. 

You're drivin' down the street and a backfire goes bang! and it blows out, you have a flat tire.  I feel it’s somethin’ I'd better do about it.  Pull the car over to the curb.  X gives the energy to change the wheel or call somebody to do it, and you go on down the road and nothin' happened.  You feel hungry, X sends a little message up from down here and says, “I need some food.”  He just got an impulse from here and says, “I need some food.”  Fine.  I'll look around and see where the nearest coffee shop or restaurant or refrigerator is and we get a bite to eat, and it goes like this and you digest it.  If you happen to put too much in, why it only uses what it requires and throws the rest of it away. If you didn't put enough in, it says get some more – very simple. 

But we don't live that way.  We listen to all of these as though they were our superior bosses and they know exactly what I should do.  “I'm getting inspiration or intuition.”  So people frequently ask me what intuition is – that's inner teaching.  And this [referring to a not-I] guy is always teaching you that you're probably in the most woe-be-gone misfortune.  And that if you would just straighten up and fly right and that you would pick up some much of little "Take me!" so you could improve yourself; but then when you do that, you think he says, [And Bob claps his hands, like “well done!”]  Uhh-uhh.  He says, "What'd you get that crap for?  Hmmph!”  What, you been there?  Did you ever go take a course that was greatly gonna improve you, that this thing said up here?  And you got it all done and when you got it done, it said, "That's no value in the world.  What did you waste all your time and money goin' down there for?  You could of used the money to bought you a new car." 

(It’s true.  I actually —) 

You been right there and he talked at you right there.  I said I've been followin’ you and pursue you every night, I know what you're goin’ through, hon.  Now this is the demon behavior.  And the sooner we recognize that that's simply a demon and has no value whatsoever to me, I would begin to ignore it.  Now you can't throw 'em out; but you can ignore them.  You can see they have no value to you.  Now if we stood out here in the front of this buildin’ (I would say the far side of the buildin’ – the front, you don't see nothin') and watch the traffic go up and down the street, now can you, by your will power, control what kind of traffic goes up and down the street?  Can you determine there will be noblue cars come up the street today?  No.  But you can see that what's goin’ up and down the street really is so insignificant to you, is that right?  It doesn't matter. 

Now all these things are is that they have to fool you, and we said they live in the basement and you have to go down there with 'em.  They are a lot of traffic going through the pathways in the human brain.  It’s traffic, just unadulterated traffic.  And does it matter to you what traffic goes through the street?  Do you care if there's blue cars goin’ down the street?

(No.)

No.  Do you care if there's a truck or two now and then?

(Nope.)

Do you care if there's a police car with a siren on it or a motorcyclist with a wreath on his tail?  [chuckling]  Hmm?

(No.  If he's not after me, I don't care.)

Well, even if he is?  You can stop and pay the ticket and go on, couldn’t you?  What's the difference?  Why get all upset about it?  Won't change anything.  It'll still cost you money – why get a bellyache over it.  Six bucks don't bother you very much. 

(There’s a pause while someone turns their cassette tape over.)

Ready to go again now, huh?  What'd you say, Vi?

(She and I were just talkin’ about six dollars would be a dream.)  (Laughter)

That's what you get for overparkin’, isn't it?

(Yeah, a moving violation —)

They come a little higher.  They start at $25 and go up according to how much you was over-movin’.  But I would just as soon pay the $35 for the 10 miles over the speed limit and not have any of these, cause if I was to pay the $35, get myself all worked up until I was miserable – is that right? – listen to those cats tell me what a terrible cat that policeman was.  They tell me how bad he was.  They place the blame on him, and they go on and on and on.  Now if we should merely see that all of this claptrap that's runnin' through the head is a bunch of little demons, half of which don't like the other half.  And old papa down there is sayin' "It oughta be different.  You oughta have more better and different.  You shouldn't be this way.  You oughta be that way.  They shouldn't be this way, they oughta be that way.  Why can't you control circumstances?  Surely to goodness if you'd think positive, it'd all work out."  And then they say…if you did think, “I've been thinkin' positive," they say, [in a soft, doubting voice] "You have doubts." (laughter)  You've been there, haven't you?

(Yeah.)

All of us.  And the more you struggle to be so good and listen to this guy to fit the ideal, the more deteriorated you feel, is that right?  And the more you're in a quandary about doing the “right thing.”  Now they're very holy and righteous.  This one jumps up down here and says, "Now if you would just do the right thing, everything would be all right."  Oh, that sounds so easy and simple, but what's the right thing?  No matter what you do, they say, "That wasn't the right thing…obviously!"  Or, "You didn't do it for the right purpose."  Hmm?

(Right.)

You ever been there, Arlene?  You listen to all this.  Daily.  And they give you all kinds of terrible feelings inside.  Now, if you want to, you could start this moment listenin' to the traffic without puttin’ any value whatsoever on it.  You know this is this great feeling that we're all talkin’ about that I have to do.  You have to do what those things say?  I think it's the biggest joke.  You see people always wonder why I laugh a lot.  It’s watchin' the antics of these demons and then people believe them.  You know that's the biggest joke I've ever seen in all creation.  I mean, that you hear a little fuzzy and you go do it.  There's one of 'em gonna make you miserable anyway, you know.  You don’t have to tangle up your whole existence, hmm?  But you just have to do it 'cause they said so, huh?  Now we call this “thinking about it”, we talk about “solving problems” (which these two [“A” and “B”] argue with each other) and we call that “solvin’ a problem,” you know.  [pointing to the Picture of Man on the board]  This one says, "Well, I shouldn't be treated this way."  And this one says, "Yes, but if you would have considered them a little bit, it wouldn't have happened."   You know, they know everything that would have happened otherwise.  You heard that?

(Absolutely.)

“If you'd have just been a little more on the ball, that wouldn't have happened," and so we get this one.  And this one says that you got to have all of this and…  But any way you start to get it… say you wanted the pleasure and comfort, attention and approval and if you went out just to get some attention – you know, honestly said, "Well, I'm goin' out and get some attention," do you think those others would hold still on that?  Or would they jump up and down and tell you you're vain, egotistical, and you should have your face slapped and your mouth washed out with soap and all sorts of things, huh? 

(Right.)

You been there?

(Absolutely.)

Now if you just wanted to go out and get some attention, you could easily do that, huh? 

(Um-hmm.)

But could you? 

(Without all that?)

Well, could you even start or would they prevent you from even startin'?  And they always give you a thousand reasons as to why you're like you are and all of 'em's lousy, is that right?

(Mm-hmm.)

Hmm?

(Yes.)

So would you…huh, Judy?

(No.  Question.)

Oh, you was just scratchin', huh?

(No, question.  Will you talk about the Chooser?)

He's not there yet.  So I'm trying to talk about, could the Chooser, which is I, choose up and say, "I'm not gonna listen to all this jazz – it's just traffic runnin’ through there,” okay?  We put him over here.  We call him the Chooser, over here.

(Oh.  Under “A”, the Awareness, the Chooser?)

Well, just plain Awareness – that's the Chooser.  He can choose what he's gonna do.  You can choose how you're gonna act.  You can choose what you're gonna listen to.  You can choose what suggestions you're gonna pay any attention to.  So do you have to listen to all this, or can you say, "Aw, that's just traffic runnin' up and down the street."  It has no value to you.  Now could you just go on and do what you want to without listening to all that claptrap, demon chatter, hmm?  That right?  There's nothin' to prevent you from it as long as you know what it is; but you see we've always attributed this to being something from my innermost being. You have the parasites in there.  Now when you just get worms, you can take a vermifuge, but I haven’t found a pill that you can take for this one.  But nevertheless, you don't have to put any value on it, do you?  Hmm?

(No, you don't.)

Now if you want to shut up this half of 'em, that's very easy, you know, so they won't be scolding you about what you wanted to do.  You slug down about four or five good double shots or straight martinis on the rocks (or up, better… without the ice in it.)  Alcohol just numbs this one right out of the picture, okay?  Knocks it right out.  Now if you want to get this one out of the way and you don't want this one to be…you like this one.  You want to be this all the time, but you want to get this one out of the way, get you a few sticks of marijuana and you'll be as gentle as a baby.  But it all wears off after while.  Yes, Russ.

(If alcohol knocks that out —)

It’s just temporary.

(Yeah.)

And when he comes back, is he pissed.  (laughter)   

(Is this one of the areas in which an alcoholic wanting to become an alcoholic, or is it —)

Well, that's one of the reasons.  This one torments him so much, that he finds out that alcohol shuts him up and for a few minutes he's without conflict.

(Is that one of the reasons, or — I know absolutely nothing about alcoholism.)

Well, I do.

(Is that — in other words if you cure that, you cure alcoholism, is that one of the things that —)

Well, if he gets all this out so he don't listen to not-I's, he has no particular need for alcohol.  He may have a social drink with somebody, but he's not out there guzzlin’ down for the effects of it.  When he drinks to shut this [“A”] up, so only this [“B”] can function…cause you finally drink enough, both of 'em go out; but just about two martinis will put this very back under, out of the way.  But oh, do they scream when they come to.  They said, “You hit me in the head and I'm...."  and they start screamin', and the guy's got to have another drink.  Yes, dear?

(What about the maudlin ones, the people who drink and cry, and tell sad stories and turn the music on, and all that, and oh, complains?)

Complains, and he blames.

(But he blames himself —)

Well, it doesn't matter who you blame.  Blamin' yourself is just as misguided as blamin’ the other guy.  Nothin' nor nobody's to blame.

(It’s still an “A”.)

Oh, yes.  Blamer’s always an “A”.  He's over here.  We’re callin’ him “A” because he got there first; and we'll call this one “B”.  Now, you give 'em a good jolt of marijuana or some such a thing and a little while, “Oh, isn't it peaceful, wonderful, and I don't want anything.  I already got it all.”  But that one’s…”A's” also ticked off when that wears off and he needs some more.  And it's not because we get addicted to the substance so much, is that we are addicted to not feeling in conflict.  You see, you can temporarily destroy conflict 'cause you're not this now, cause you're not in conflict.  You know if you raised a kid up and never did make him have a little “B”, which Vi said she didn't get until she run out of hair, (laughter) it would never be in conflict with itself.  It'd just be in conflict with everybody else.  You see, a drunk is not in conflict with himself but he's sure in conflict with everybody else.  It can really get on your skin if you're not drunk too, is that right?  Ever been around a drunk and you sober?

(Yes.)

Horrible, isn't it?  But they're not in conflict with themselves, you know.  You say, “Come on, let's go home.”  He says, "Just…just one more."  You know, "Keep your shirt on and have one more and then we'll go."  You say, "We're closin' down the bar."  [In a slurred tone as a drunk would say it.]  "Well, have one more.  You don’ wanna close this bar down when ya got customers in here, have you?"  This “A”, and any other one, is just all nicey and makes poetry that nobody can read (laughter) and all that good stuff, but finally it’s [unclear].  Now do you want to be controlled by those, or can you have them pointed out to you once and see what they are?  And you go out and if they come by…you can't keep 'em from comin' by, any more than you can keep the phone from ringin’ by a wrong number at 4 o’clock in the mornin', right?  You can't have that…you can't prevent that.  Not long ago I got up and turned the phone around and got the phone and the guy said, "Lillian?"  (laughter) I said, "Lillian ain't here."   [In a belligerent tone.]  "She's gotta be there!  Who the hell are you?"  I said, "Well, I'm Lillian’s boyfriend and she is sound asleep, now what do you want?"  "I'll kill her!"  I imagine Lillian had a rough time.  (Laughter)  So you can't prevent phones from ringin' at 4 o'clock in the mornin’, right?  But you can choose your response…so I got old Lillian in trouble. 

But choose your response.  Now you can't keep these demons from hollerin’.  They're independent agents and you have no control over 'em.  But you don't have to pay any attention to them.  Now if you don't feed them at your house for a couple a three weeks, they have a tendency to travel over somewheres else.  You wouldn't stay where you weren't fed, would you?  So you see they’ve moved in and set up housekeepin’ and have had us provide food and everthing for 'em.  Now if I quit payin’ any attention to 'em and don't allow me to get upset…in other words I go up on the second floor.  They're all in the basement anyway.  I go up on the main floor of the house and sit in the living room and use the nice kitchen and look at the nice view out the window, instead of down there in that dark, dank basement. They're still down there hollerin’, but I don't pay no attention 'em.  I can hear them down there thumpin’ around, kickin’ in doors and stuff, but I don't feed 'em.  Now if I don't feed 'em for three weeks, they pretty well go away.  They get weak so they don't holler so loud.  But you see, most of us feed 'em so good, they can scream their heads off, right?  Mmm?

(Right)

And then if they can get two people together and get the two of 'em goin', you know. This guy sits here and really has a ball because he's got you stickin' up for your rights and that other guy you’re around, he's sticking up for his rights – he blames you, you blame him.  Oh, man, isn't that a beautiful existence?  That's the way most existences run, isn't it?  You been in it?

(Yes.)

You blame him, he blames you, right?  And you stick up for your rights and defend yourself and he sticks up for his rights and defends himself, and that creates a considerable chaos, doesn't it?  Hmm?

Right.

And we say, "I don't ever want to get in any more of these, so I won't get hurt."  But nothin's hurtin’ you except you're lettin'…listenin’ to the demons.  Now if you said, “Well I know they're there.  I cannot control them.  They're not I.  They're runnin' all over the place, but I don't have to pay any attention to them.  I can go on about my business and let them kick and scream all they please.”  Huh?  My business is, we'll say, is just to be a good guest, the Awareness Function for X – all the pretty, nice things which obviously if we check out, we really are, okay?  I don't know what oughta be, and they sure don't, ‘cause they're in there in the dark kickin' around, but aw, to listen to them, they know everthing.  So they say that all creation was made a mess, that the Creator made a royal mess when He made this, and they ought to get to straighten it out, huh?  You buy that?

(No.)

No.  Now you don't have to listen to them, don't have to agree with 'em, don't have to accept anything they say – but you can't keep ‘em from talkin’.  But you just don't put any value on it, okay?  You could do that, couldn't you?  And so they talk all night, but you got a little horse sense, that one over there that says, "Well, all I got to do is be a good guest.  I'm not sayin' whether I did it for the right reason or wrong reason, or any other thing.  I'm here and I'm gonna do it."  Okay?  “And I'm gonna treat everybody with simple good manners, and I have nothing about me that needs to be defended and I have nothing that I have to prove.”  Hmm?  That's right, isn't it?  You can't prove you're here.  I see you, but you could say, well, I'm havin’ a hallucination. You try to prove you're real.  I'd say, "Well, that's just hallucinations I’m seein’ there.”  You can't even prove you exist, so why try to prove you're right?  Hmm?  And all they're doin' is hollerin', tellin’ you…this one here says, “You got to prove you are right!  And that you know what ought to be, and those other jokers don't!”  Now other people know how everbody else in the world knows what's right, but they go on and do wrong anyway, don't they?  The dirty dogs. That's what this one says.  "Everbody knows what's right, but they go and do wrong anyway."  Did you ever feel people around you knew what was right, but they’re goin’ on and doin’ wrong anyway?

(Yes, Sir.)

Did you?  Would you sometime try to do somethin’ you feel is wrong, improper and unjustifiable and see if you can do it?

(What do you mean by something you consider....)

Would you…I don't know, you tell me it's proper.  Would you feel it was right, proper and justifiable to steal her tape recorder?

(No.)

Well, let's see you do it.  But you may have to justify it.  (We have to be quiet, the tape’s changin’.)  You couldn’t quite do that, could you?

(No.)

Because it's not right, and you’re not the kind of person that can justify.  Now if she owed you $300.00 and has refused to pay you for the last couple of years, it’s conceivable a little not-I would say, “Mmm, well, just get it…the tape recorder would get part of our money anyway.”   Now then it would be justifiable to you, wouldn't it?  You could do that then.

(Yes.)

Right?  You see we can always justify somethin'.  There’s a little not-I…they will help you justify it until you do it, and then they run away and leave you all alone with it.  And then the other one jumps up and says, "What in the hell did you do that for?  You knew it was wrong."  Did you ever do somethin' when you look back on and said, "I knew that was wrong when I did it,"?

(Yes.)

You...that's a lying little not-I.  It's impossible to do.  Did you ever feel "I knew that was wrong"?

(Right.)

That was a lying not-I, ‘cause you cannot do it if you feel it’s wrong, improper or unjustified.  Now maybe I'd say, “Well, it would be wrong ordinarily, but under this case, with all this money she owes me, I'm just gonna recall it.”   Hmm?  So you'd feel it was justified.  You can't do it without that.  Yes, Judy.

(What kind of thinking do you think goes on with people like that strangler that's running all over Southern California killing young girls?)

I think he's runnin’ around killin’ little girls.

(No, young 18-, 20-year olds.)

I don't know, is he 18 or 20 or more?

(No, the girls he's killed.)

Oh, the girls he's killed.  That's what I heard, he's runnin’ around over in California killing little 18-, 20-year-old girls.

(In his mind —)

I haven't examined him and talked with him.  I'm only talking about what's going on in our minds, but I can pretty well guesstimate what was there.  He has been disapproved of by some female somewheres or other and he says, "They're all…".  You know it’s very easy to take one person mistreatin' him and paint ‘em all with the same brush.  One Chicano called me an S.O.B. one day in Spanish.  (laughter)  It would be easy to say that all them damn Mexicans are uncouth bastards, huh?  That's easy to say, isn't it?  Did you ever paint the whole thing with a brush?  You see, one lady had jilted me one time.  She went off with another cat that had more money than I did; and I said, “All women do is just chase the he who's got the most money.”  You know, all of you are put in the same category.  Now that's not quite accurate, is it?  Huh?  But did you ever do a thing like that – decide something about one person of one class that you classified, did something that was unpleasant, and you wipe 'em all in the same brush?

(Maybe.)  (Maybe.  I don't remember.)

Did you?

(I did.) 

Men are what? 

(Arabs.)

All men are Arabs.  (lots of laughter)  “Arabs are somebody that don't like us Jews and they are dirty bastards.”  That’s right.   (laughter) 

(Right.)

Right, they’re all a bunch of Arabs.  My Daddy told me never trust a man smoked a pipe or an Arab.  (laughter)  Don't ever trust a man who smokes a pipe or an Arab.  See, he had 'em all painted with a brush up there real good.  So I heard that very early in life that those were two kinds of total…  Seriously, everybody smokes a pipe and Arabs, okay?  You can't trust 'em, honey.  They'll take everything you got.  (laughter)  You know that.  What of men?  Tell me about men?  What do they do to you? 

(unclear)

Sometimes, or all of 'em are?

(No, sometimes.)

What's one characteristic of all of 'em accordin’ to this cat right here [he points to one of the decisions]?

(I don't think I have one characteristic all the time.)

They hurt little girls. 

(Sometimes, some of them.)

Well, how about one that didn't ever hurt you?  Did you ever have one of those?

(Oh, yeah.)

But he was a weakling.  (laughter)  You just can't stand weak men.  (more laughter)  You see, if one pushes you around, he's an S.O.B., huh?

(Right.)

And if you get one that don't push you around, you say, “He's a weaklin’, I just can't stand him.”  Is that correct?

(Boring.)

Yeah, he's weak, a bore – they're weaklings.  They always know everything they're gonna do and they’re very dependent.  “I just can't stand him.  I'm gonna write him off.  And I'll get one that pushes me around, and I say men are brutes,” hmm?  But he's never strong.  He's never like they ought to be, Barbara.

(Right.)

That correct?  Now this is traffic.  So let's label all this traffic.  [he circles all the decisions]  Now I cannot control what traffic goes by, runs down the street, right?  But I can choose my response – just totally ignore it.  What difference does the traffic on the street — when I’m runnin' over here on the walk, or sittin' in the restaurant, or in the house lookin' out the window — what's the traffic got to do with it?  Does that have anything to do with you, Joy?  You're sittin' up in your pretty little house lookin' out the window at all kinds of traffic goin' by.  Does that disturb you?  Who cares?  You're gonna do what you want to do aren’t you?  Ok, that's the whole show here.  Now you see, we have been transformed from a battleground for a bunch of invaders over to where X, and I, and the physical body is all working as one unit and that is balanced being.  And in that state there is serenity, peace, ecstasy, joy, compassion, understanding, all those little goodies, because that's our nature before the intruder took us over.  Now we can't keep the intruder from comin' in; but we don't have to let him take over.  Mmm?

(Right.)

They're there; but they do have to stay in their domain, in the dark.  Now I’m tryin’ to turn on the lights in the basement this mornin’. 

(Right.)

Yes, Linda?

(What is the I, Bob?)

It's the Awareness Function of X.  It's not a thing at all.  It’s a no thing, but it is a function.  Like digestion is not a thing, but it's a function of a digestive tract, which is a thing.  An Awareness is not a thing, but it is…I am a no thing; but I'm the function of X, the Awareness Function of X.  I don't have to judge anything, I don't have to condemn it and I don't have to listen to demons as my authority.  So if I don’t listen to authority, one of 'em comes along and tells me what's gonna happen a thousand years from now – "Blah, blah-blah."   You've heard that, haven't you?  You had to believe it, didn't you?  That's just one of those little not-I's said, “What's gonna happen a thousand years from now?”  Yes?

(Bob, it seems that I sleep walk quite a bit.)

You do what?

(Sleep walk, because I wake up standing in the middle of the road with all this traffic goin’ on, you know.  How do I get to the other side?)

Well, I tippy-toe out – right quick.  Let 'em go!  Now it’s no disgrace to be in there.  You know, it's nothin’ to be invaded.  It’s whether you take it serious after you've been, you see?  Whether you decide that's ‘you’ because the invader come in or whether you see, “Well, that's nothing to do, I'm just gonna tippy-toe outa here.”  You know, people are always talkin’ about seeing whether they can walk on water or not.  We filled up a swimming pool down in New Mexico one time.  It was an Olympic-sized pool and it was about the middle of March.  It was a nice day, kind of like this, but we went out there and pumped very cold water into it.  About 48 degrees comes out of the ground there and we filled it all full, and it looked so pretty and bright.  One of the young guys who works with us run out on that diving board and dived in.  And he come up and he never went back in the water.  He didn't walk on water, he tippy-toed off of that thing. 

(Bob, you can walk on water.)

Huh?

(You can walk on water.)

Sure.

(Freeze it first.)

Right.  Sometimes you just lay a board on top of it and then walk on top of that.  You walk on water all the time.  Also walk through walls.  I find out where the door is, that's just a hole in the wall there.  So I walk through walls all the time.  I look through walls.

(Walkin’ in the rain, you walk on one.)

Yeah, well I…  Judy?

(One way — is this true, that one way of ignoring the not-I's is to agree with them?)

No, no, no, no – that's not ignorin’.  That's like gettin' out there and stickin’ your finger on every car that comes down the street.  Naw, it's just traffic, why bother with it?  It has no value.  And if I'm gonna recognize somethin’, I'm givin’ it some sort of a value.  You see the ancients talked about worshippin’ idols.  Hmm?  And so if they went and worshipped the idol, whether they agreed with it or not, they give the idol power.  Now we give these idols, which are not-I's, tremendous power over us.  We make them our rulers, our advisers, our consultants.  And they tell us what to do and what not to do and bitch about what we did do, and never pleased with us at all.  They don’t…End of CD 20

Santa Ana School – CD 21 

There’ll be never anything you do pleases ‘em, right?

(Right.)

Okay.  So you just see that it’s traffic and who pays any attention to traffic?  And we have said all week that you don’t have to stay down there in the basement and recognize and argue with ‘em – you go up the stairs.  You begin to act like you’re in a total different level than where these lives.  You might say everything they come up with is negative if you want to use that term, right?  (It’s not in my vocabulary – I’m borrowin’ that one this morning.)  Everything was on a downer as far as they’re concerned – bad, ugly, abnormal and out, hmm?  So we move up on the next floor by beginning to act as though – for 15 or 20 minutes – that I’m the luckiest person in the world.  And then you really begin to feel that way and you have left their domain.  But, you see, we feel obligated to stay in there and settle this.  You know, one of ‘em on you – if you start to leave, they’ll jump up and say, “Chicken!  You’re goin’ off and not settlin’ this conflict – you haven’t got that goose out of the bottle yet and here you are just walkin’ off like nothing was happening!”  Now, have I covered everything you was gonna talk about? 

(Uh-uh.)

Which one’s left? 

(giggles)  (Well, I suppose you have.)

And you know darn well I have!  [he’s laughing]  Right?  I’ve covered every one of ‘em because I’ve been sittin’ here listenin’ and I can’t find another one.  I got the last pickle out of the barrel.  But I’ll gladly sit down and visit with you, but we’re not gonna rehash this again, okay?  And we really have nothin’ to talk about except, “Hi, Bob, I’m glad to see you – I just wanted to sit near you for a little while.”  Yes?

(Okay.)  (You’re looking for the traffic on that endless loop burning up the machine.)

Well, this’ll…but you see if I leave it, it won’t burn it up.  If I try to settle it, or make it agree – if I try to make this agree with this, then I got that infinite loop.

(Yeah, the infinite loop on the traffic…so you got –)

“Why did they ever happen to be that way?” is the infinite loop.  A “why” question is one with no answers – just walk off and leave it – don’t bother.  Question, comment, discussion?  Yes, dear.

(When multiple not-I’s rear their ugly heads –)

Well, some of them are real pretty – they have long eyelashes (laughter) and long hair and they’re very enticing. 

(Wanting to fool you.  And I’m not sure I can tell the difference when it’s real and when it’s a not-I.)

There is… all things is not-I and the rest of it is just simply what you want to do.  What is your purpose in living?  You don’t have to have all this advice to be simply a good guest or make some insignificant little contribution – there is nothing gonna give you any advice and when you hear it, tell it to go back where it belongs.  You know where that is? 

(The basement.)

Hell – pit – “Into the pit with you!”  And the whole thing is you run out of the pit.  Then you don’t have all this noise goin’ in your head – the head is quiet.  We used to talk about it as having a “quiet mind.”  You can only have a quiet mind when you choose how you’re gonna feel and the way you can choose how you’re gonna feel is how you act.  As long as you’re in here, it’s a battleground, okay?  But you don’t have to pay any attention to it.  You see, I’m not disturbed by standin’ on the corner of Hollywood and Vine – there’s a lot of traffic goin’ by, yeah?  But it don’t bother me to go out here and watch the freeway.  Does it you?  ‘Cause I’m not out there trying to control it, am I?  Now, if you sat there and made it important that you could prevent any blue cars or yellow pick-up trucks from goin’ down the road, you’d get highly frustrated before the day’s over.  Right?  Now, you see there is nothing gonna tell you somethin’ so there’s no real voice and false voice, okay?  They’re just a bunch of falsies.  And falsies are very unsatisfying to nibble on…chewy.  (laughter)  The not-I’s are good and evil, which was a false apple, and it left ‘em hungry until this day.  You see, that’s what you’re doin’.  Here’s the Tree of the Knowledge of Good and Evil – it says this is good and this is not, hmm?

(Mm-hmm.)

Right?

(Right.)

And then they said two ways to get it – and so that’s the knowledge of good and evil, which will kill you it says, and the day you eat or nibble of that, you was dead.  And so you really are; you can’t function at all if you’ve really taken a good solid bite of it, is that right?

(Uh-huh.)

Good.

(Thank you.)

There’s no voices to pay any attention to, okay?  You look and say, “I want to do that.”  Simply because I want to say, “Thank you for having been invited to this party,” and so I will be what to me is a good guest here today, okay?  That may be being considerate of people – it may being makin’ a little contribution to their well-being.  You’re not gonna do it all – just a contribution; and a contribution is kind of like the amount of salt that you drip over in the bowl when you’re making a loaf of bread, okay?  The salt’s a contribution – don’t try to make the whole cake.  If you do, you’ll blow up.

(Okay.)

Okay?  You hear it?

(I hear it.)

Okay.  Question, comment? 

(What time do we start this afternoon?)

Two-thirty…and don’t come back too fast just yet…I gotta go buy an airplane.  [pointing to audience members with raised hands]  Here, I’ll take you and then I’ll get across.

(What about alcohol – the effects of alcohol on the not-I’s?)

It knocks “B” out. 

(What about the hard jobs like the opiates?)

Well, there’s different sums of ‘em.  Part of ‘em knock “B” out and part of ‘em knock “A” – you have to divide ‘em up.  It’s accordin’ to the effects of ‘em – some of ‘em knock ‘em out and some of ‘em don’t.

(But all types of drug would either knock one or the other out?)

Right.  It never knocks ‘em both out unless you over-d’d…OD’d.  [abbreviating “over-dosed”]  And that knocks ‘em both out.

(laughter)  (Then you died.  What about alcohol and marijuana – would that knock both of ‘em out?)

Well, when you put straight alcohol – I’m not talking ‘bout a little wine or a little beer…

(What about wine?)

Oh well, wine and beer is – marijuana goes along is usually the more powerful and so you are peaceful but not quite as peaceful as you would be you just had one alone, you see.  When you take a stimulant and sedative at the same time, they partially cancel each other out and create as a by-product some very toxic substances that the body has to throw out next week.  Yes, dear?

(Does food work the same way like alcohol?)

Food?  Well, some people use it – you see if I eat a tremendous amount of starch, it’s a powerful sedative, and it does knock “B” out for a little bit.  If I eat a lot of starch and sweets, it’ll knock “B” out for a little bit.

(I used to feel in a stupor from eating major portions of food.)

Honey particularly is a very powerful sedative.  It has a narcotic in it.

(Honey?)

Yeah.

(Honey???)

Yeah, it lays you out – just eat a bunch of it and you’re out.

(But food has knocked me out for like 14,15 hours I would say – straight food.)

Yeah, you were kind of knocked out, yeah, but you noticed the food you got was mostly tended towards the sweet and starchy stuff, is that right?

(Yeah, carbohydrates.  Yup, uh-huh.)

You went for high carbo.

(High carbo.)

Yeah.

(Very high.)  (Bob, I caught what you said about alcohol and wine – the difference between.  You didn’t consider wine in the same category as scotch?)

Yes, dear, it’s just a lot less potent.  You know, it takes a larger volume to get the same effect.  I can get a bigger effect out of one martini than I could out of a bottle of wine, okay?

(You said honey had a narcotic – and what’s the narcotic?)

It’s bee stuff that they use to keep bees pleasant and so forth.  The bees don’t eat honey – only the little ones and it keeps ‘em from fussin’.  I don’t know what the narcotic is, but it has a narcotic effect.  I don’t think it’s been isolated, but it’s obviously there. 

(Is it natural to the honey?)

Oh, yeah.  It’s the nature of it.

(Why is it…like……)

Go ahead.

(Like an alcoholic who often has one drink and feels like he can’t stop – and I know for myself, sometimes if I’m in a sugar thing, like if I start with one cookie, it seems almost like I can’t stop.  Is that just because I think that or –)

Well, you see there’s an ad in the television says you can’t eat just one.  (lots of laughter)  Now, the alcoholic is trying to find an ideal feeling.  So this little guy says, “Now, if you’ll just have one drink, you’ll feel better” – they got the conflict goin’.  So this one says what the ideal is, you know – “You should feel good, so if you’ll have one drink, you’ll feel better.”  So he has one drink and sure enough, he does feel a little better – he has less conflict.  And then this little guy says, “Now, if you had one more...”  You know, the alcoholic always says, “Just one more drink and then I’ll go”– just one more now.  Never has to say I’m gonna have three or four – he’s just gonna have one.  So he gets one more, and it says, “See, you feel a lot better…now get you a third one.”  And after the third you can’t count.  But it still said, “Just one more.”)

Continued............

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