Exercises - Taking Charge

(*Audience participation is in parentheses--notations in brackets have been added for clarification )

[We enter the workshop with a question from the audience…..Marsha]

(I've heard that until you change your purpose, you can't experience faith, grace and agape.)

I would say that that is somewhere about correct; and I would possibly rephrase it and say instead of change your purpose--until you take charge of it. I believe I would state it under those terms at this particular moment. Until a person takes charge of their purpose, the old purpose (that was not taken charge of) will be operating. That means there will be blaming, which is not agape, there will be complaining, which is not much of anything; and there will be feelings of urgency to please people and to do as your told and all that kind of stuff--you know the old conditioning back there.

So I will slightly rephrase it and say until one takes charge of their purpose; which definitely would mean there would be a change in purpose somewhere or other--or at least a change in achieving it. I think that would be absolutely correct--to the best of my knowledge and practice.

(So are there are steps in the taking charge?)

...........of the inner state? Now the first thing in anything is taking charge of it. Now I've had people with heavy tremors. If you can get them to take charge of the tremor--now we're not trying to stop the tremor. It has all kinds of names. They can take charge of it and deliberately start to shake it. You see, the tremor is involuntary. They can get in charge by showing you how they do it this way, and they can begin to throw cups and forks around. Now they're taking charge of it.

Now, it's the same with worry. So a person is worrying. Now it is useless to tell a person "Stop worrying". At the most they will worry because they are worrying so much--that is a literal fact. So if a person would deliberately begin to worry--you use the idea that you are going to worry more. You build those worries more and then you are working on them. You're doing this consciously--you are taking charge of it.

Now you have to take charge where it is, not somewhere else. People have a great heavy idea in their head of opposites. If I'm worrying--I "shouldn't" worry. If I'm angry--I "shouldn't" be angry.

If I should find myself angry (which I haven't in a long time); but if I should, I would immediately take charge of it and be super angry for a little bit. I get off by myself, shut the door to the bathroom while I'm being super angry. I would want to take charge.

If I have a pain I will usually try to make it hurt a little worse. I'm taking charge of it. I know something to do to aggravate it a little bit, ok?

So the moment you take charge, you can begin to do something about it; but until you take charge--there is no other way to accomplish anything. Now if I found myself very anxious, I would immediately try to be more anxious. I would make it super important, whatever it was I was anxious about. So you take charge where you are, not someplace else.

The average individual, as we have been conditioned all our lives, tries to do something they consider to be opposite. That is not taking charge--that only increases the conflict.

If I felt I overeat, I'd get myself a whole bunch of groceries and begin to overeat deliberately. Now I'm in charge of the overeating, and I can then put it anywhere I want to. When people want to stop something and they begin to fight it. Fighting only builds up more anxiety, more stresses and pressures on it. If I want lose weight, I think the first thing I'd do is see if I couldn't fatten up two pounds. Strange as it may seem, you would probably have a very hard time doing it--but at least you could work at it.

You see, you can watch that people all the time try to do the opposite. Now there is no such thing as opposites. There are only degrees of things. So the appropriate way to go is to take charge of what the present situation is; and do that very thing even though you may continue it for a while exaggerated.

If you find yourself worrying, then really worry. Worry deliberately--consciously!

If I find myself feeling sick, I'm gonna be really sick--I will be deliberately be sick for a few minutes. I'm taking charge of it.

So as you take charge of things, then you can begin to do anything you want to. The thing that we have been conditioned with is that we are "victims of circumstance" and "playthings of nature".

If I feel lonely, well then there's nothing I can do but to feel lonely until someone comes along and relieves it. But I can go ahead and feel extremely lonely and then I'm taking charge of that bit.

You can go through any one of the human emotions. You take charge of what you're experiencing at the moment. Take it away from happenstance and begin to do it deliberately. And that is including purpose and everything else.

Now yesterday we used the idea that my purpose could be being non-disturbed. Now I have discovered that when I give this as an experiment to a number of people--very quickly while they are trying to be non-disturbed, it changes. Now I could talk about changing their purpose until my teeth chatter; and it wouldn't do any good. But if I start them on using a different method of taking charge, pretty soon they see there's something far more valuable than being non-disturbed. Being non-disturbed is a by-product. It is unnecessary to work for that in the first place. So the method that we talked about usually becomes the purpose very quickly.

If we had said to change the purpose, then no change ever takes place. It procrastinates and procrastinates, and procrastinates some more. Even though a person knows something they can do very quickly to feel real good-the procrastination is a fact of life and will take over.

Now let's take procrastination. I think everybody here is capable of procrastination a little bit--unintentionally, is that right? Now let's suppose that we deliberately begin to procrastinate. Now I'm going to procrastinate writing the rent check. I'm gonna procrastinate sending the electric bill in. I'll do it tomorrow, not today. I'm going to deliberately do this. You find you don't have any fun in procrastinating any more. But first you take charge and deliberately put it off, ok? Just deliberately do it. Now that is the only approach. I know people who have been fighting procrastination for 40 years--and they're still procrastinating all over the place. But if you deliberately begin to procrastinate, you find you can't do it very long.

(It's like you get anxious, that you want to do something.)

You get over the procrastination and want to go the other way. You see the human body is rather peculiar. One thing is that people watch over the body all the time. If you spy on any self-respecting body or mind, it refuses to operate adequately while being spied upon. It just flat refuses.

(There are also all these things that we're trying not to do, we feel that we have to do.)

So you got a conflict going. You deliberately go ahead and not do them. You're free to not do them, and so you deliberately 'don't do them" freely for a few minutes and the fascination with not doing them ends, so then you can either do them or not do them.

(If you "don't do" them deliberately, then suddenly you don't care about procrastinating?)

The whole bit is that X says, "I'm running the body", "I'm running it's behavior according to what you told me." You tell me you don't want to do something' and then you tell me to "behave another" and X says, "Go hang it up."

(So taking charge is part of self-knowing?)

At least you can take charge of what's going on at the present; and drop off the effort to change things into something else. Now you're not going reverse anything. Life flows in a straight line. It may go this way and that way; but it heads in the same direction all the time. And you're not going to change it, until you do take charge.

We have a perfect partner in X who will take care of all "hows" if I will merely decide "what" singly. But the unfortunate thing is that most people have two "what's" at least. Then they're trying to figure out the "how"; and X says, "Well, if you're so darn smart, let's see you do it." And that's when you tangle up. But you can take charge of any situation that does exist at the moment. That you can do. Then without any effort you can find that your purpose can be changed very quickly. But with just trying to change a purpose (without taking charge of the present situation), you find that it is practically, if not, totally impossible. And I don't want to do the impossible. I don't even want to work at it.

(You said once you take charge, you then find you can change your purpose.)

You can change your purpose, but only if you take charge of the present situation. You can try to change your purpose, but that's where it will stay. You can struggle with it and only build a conflict, honey. It doesn't change. But when you do take charge of the present moment………………..say that I wanted to go to sleep, I have insomnia; so I decided that I was gonna try to get to sleep. I've had four calls on that subject this morning--that people stayed awake most of the night. It's a very common subject out there. One lady was crying and having a hysterical fit that she could only sleep 2 1/2 hours last night. She told me over and over how after she woke up, she had tried and tried (the rest of the night) to get to sleep.

Well, if I should wake up during the night which I do frequently, having a lousy conscience or whatever it is, I wake up frequently. So then I decide to stay awake and listen to night sounds. You know there's little birds singing off over here and a car going by and something clicks and groans here, and water runs somewhere. So you stay awake and listen to night sounds--pretty soon you wake up and it's morning.

(So that's changing your purpose, your first purpose was to go to sleep.)

No, I didn't have the first purpose; I just lay down and let nature take it course. Everybody has the idea that they can get to sleep. "I've got to get back to sleep." I close my little eyeballs and they keep popping open. The point is if I'm awake, I'm gonna take charge of it and deliberately be awake and do something. I'm going to listen to night sounds, or see what I can see around and so forth. See what's going on. I might see something very lovely when I'm looking; but I'm going to stay awake. Then all of a sudden you wake up and it's morning. You don't know how you got to sleep. Now none of us know how to get to sleep, I don't believe, is that right?

(I don't know how.)

But did you ever try to get to sleep in a night? You spend hours at it, right.

(Yes)

Next time you're awake in the night, make it your purpose, or deliberately take charge of being awake and use it for listening or looking or something and all of a sudden you'll find it's morning.

(Would it be more accurate to say "when you take charge, you then change your purpose" or would it be more accurate to say "when you take charge, your purpose is changed".)

I think the first one would be accurate. You change it a little bit because you begin to see the joke in it. In other words if you ever saw the joke in trying to get to sleep when you don't know how to sleep anyway--you don't have the foggiest idea. All the greatest scientists in the world have been studying sleep for years. They tape people up and everything. They don't know anything about it. They still don't know what's going on. They don't even know why you require sleep. You don't know how to do it, so why should you try to do something you don't have the foggiest idea of how to do in the first place.

(And that applies to practically everything.)

It applies to everything. Cause you don't know how to do anything.

(I heard you say something about by-products, being non-disturbed)

Being non-disturbed is a by-product, not a purpose. It's a non-disturbed thing of consciously choosing your own purpose. It's not something you do by intention. The more you try to be non-disturbed unintentionally; usually the more disturbed you get.

You could look over the last 27 1/2 years of your life which is since you were born and I think you would find that that was the case. You've been unknowingly trying to be non-disturbed all these years, and most the time you were either disturbed or distracted--one or the other.

(Yes.)

So it would appear that maybe we could see that that was a joke, and we wouldn't run after it anymore; but I think the way to discover the joke, is to deliberately and intentionally go out and do your very best to be non-disturbed.

(I've been doing that.)

OK, how does it work?

(Well, I thought I was; but in the things that I do, I'm being disturbed.)

Keep on trying to be non-disturbed. Really work at it.

(Maybe it would work if I went out and tried to be disturbed.)

Oh, that's not what we're talking about. You consciously try to be non-disturbed. Now I'm not going to hit myself with a hammer or go banging my toes or anything like that.

(I thought you said do the opposite?)

No I didn't say do the opposite. I said deliberately take charge. You are trying to be non-disturbed unconsciously. I'm saying continue on with what you're doing unconsciously, only make it conscious--not to try the opposite, the opposite may happen after a while, but that will be a by-product of your taking charge.

(If somebody was anxious, then, they'd try to be deliberately anxious)

I would deliberately take charge of it.

Basically everybody in the world started off as an infant trying to be non-disturbed. They didn't know that was what they were doing, ok? When once you see that that's what you are doing, it's just like anxiety or anything else, you take charge of it by deliberately doing it for a while. And when you try to do it, you see the joke in having that as a purpose; because really, non-disturbance is a by-product not something we work for. You can only start on anything by taking charge of it where it is, not trying to make the opposite out of it.

(Is the rest of it an "experiencing" or is "doing" involved?)

I would say there is some of both. Faith is the ability to make up the mind. So I would say that every once in a while somebody makes up their mind. First thing you do is start making up your mind to take charge. Grace is to recognize that we have all kinds of undeserved goods. In other words I didn't do anything to be here at the party. That was pure unadulterated "gifty". Reasonably good health and about every other thing we have is gifty. There are people around you. There are things around you to do. If you just think of all the things that were here when you were born, you'd have to say we have a lot of things we didn't earn!

I've about gotten to a point, we don't earn anything, we just make little contributions to things operating.

LOAF OF BREAD STORY

I tried to figure out one time that if one loaf of bread were made for just one of us through the commercial channels, that it would cost billions of dollars. So none of us can buy a loaf of bread; we all just contribute a little bit to the farmer. We all contribute just a little bit to the transportation. We contribute a little bit to the miller. We contribute a little bit to baker. We contribute a little bit to yeast grower. And even with all those little contributions, we can go buy a loaf of bread for less than a dollar even with inflation. So I would say that we don't ever earn anything--that about everything I have, I consider as undeserved goods or grace that is simply laid on me.

Now agape is that I can begin to see things differently (after I take charge). That I could see that before having been given a little bit of information somewhere along the way to give me some guidelines as to the way to look at things, that I used to mechanically feel there was an awful lot of bad people in the world, a lot of uncouth people, a lot of people who didn't care, a lot of people who were trying to put me down a thousand and one things. But after I take charge, I look at it through another light, I see that everybody is doing what they feel is right proper or justifiable--at that moment with what light they have--and I began to see that fact, truth or reality in no uncertain terms--and that is an experiencing-yes!

It is also acted upon in the way that one lives. In other words, one ceases to be fault finding, picking or pushy, judging, wanting to go to war, lawsuits, all these things. Ah, so what, they're doing what they feel to be right, proper or justified. And that, by the way, is also the only thing I have to go by--act with what light I have in the moment. I'm doing what seems to me to be right, or proper or justifiable at the moment; but I try to not to do anything I have to justify. I've found that justifying breaks down after a while; and then I have to start all over again. So I don't bother with that.

But I do know that most people can justify anything. I know because I used to do a good job of it. I don't do it any more because I know where it leads to.

And faith is recognizing that whatever I make up my mind to, X does--if I make up my mind singly. Now if I'm a "yes, but'n", then nothing happens. But I truly make up my mind that this is the way something's gonna be. Now I think I use it every day, so it is a using as well as an experiencing. Definitely it is an experiencing. I suppose that's what some people would call a sense of security.

I have a partner that is 100 per cent dependable, 100 per cent of the time anytime that I say this is "what" singly-the "how" always happens.

Grace I don't think I do anything on that. There's an action, and I have certainly have a very decided sense of being very thankful for all these undeserved goods; and maybe being thankful is truly an action of one sort or another.

And agape is a way of seeing. It is seeing more clearly about all human beings. So obviously you act upon the way you see. So I think our statement earlier in the week, "use it or lose it" is probably correct.

Now I think these come into being as an experiencing from something we're doing. We took charge of something or other. This is the outcome. And when this happens, I think we find that there is an experiencing, which is more or less continuous. I think you would say that when you experienced all of these, that there is sense of security from the recognizing the tremendous gifts given us, and how I see the rest of the world--I think the outcome would be experiencing something called joy or happiness just about all the time. I think it is a continual experiencing; but certainly certainly influences one's actions. I don't see how it could be there and not influence.

Do you have any of those, Mary? Would you say that it influences your actions?

(Yes.)

Very definitely, huh?

I think you come up with this as the by-product. You don't go around thinking, "Well I'm experiencing faith", or "I'm experiencing grace". Pretty soon it is a cycle of being. So I think that if you were asking "what are you experiencing?"--I say it very definitely influences my activity or behavior. I'm very aware that it does; and I think it does anybody and everybody.

With that, certainly everything in a person's being begins to function differently. The body will function differently, the mind functions differently, the experiencing functions differently, the way you're seeing is different in everything. So having worked with lots of people that have frustrations and aggravations, annoyances and worries and anxieties--and after some time when they got to looking at things differently, they experienced these states about 99 1/10th per cent of the time.

So things that are an experiencing usually influences decidedly one's actions and behavior and then it is really yours and you're no longer required to read things, listen to things, talk about things--it's just there, that's all. It's you.

I think this is what is meant when it says that a person undergoes transformation. I think the outcome of having a purpose and a will that's in union or harmony or working together is transformation of a human being--they've transformed how they feel, how they act, how they look and everything else--that is the transforming direction.

I know of people that have been very sad and aggravated or annoyed or frustrated or whatever word you want; and the body looks a certain way--it behaves a certain way, and it has a whole lot of symptoms that goes along with that kind of inner state. And then when they take charge where they get in a higher state, all those things disappear. They do look entirely different.

I have had occasion to see a few times, that a person was in one day and was back the next day and I didn't know them. I have a disgustingly good memory for faces--terrible for names. I've got the faces down perfect. If they weren't with somebody (somebody that I knew that they should be with) to hook the two together, I wouldn't have known them. There's been a few cases where I thought they brought somebody else. The experience, and what went with it, had totally transformed the body. They didn't even remotely look like the person that was in yesterday. And by the same token, I've seen it go the other way. I've known a few people who looked pretty wonderful; but they heard of some unfortunate event, and they were total wrecks the next morning. I've seen that happen. In fact I saw one man that had dark hair one day and was totally white the next morning. Thank goodness that doesn't happen very often.

(Is this transformation thing a moment by moment thing or is it permanent?)

Well, I would say that it has a high degree of probability of being permanent unless it was produced by outside forces.

Now sometimes you could produce such good news for somebody that, for a little bit, they'd be full of joy. But as soon as they get used to the news, it's no longer that way. But I'd say if you did it by your own efforts of taking charge first, then having a new purpose, that it would be permanent. I cannot conceive of me changing my purpose. I'm enjoying it too much like it is. I've had people try to sell me on a lot of other purposes, but I'm hard to sell. I'm a tough prospect.

(Let us say that you are acting depressed, concerned........When you act in exactly the opposite direction to what the thinking process tells you, (the not i's) it produces a type of a fear of pain. The mind says "Oh, my God...")

One of the double heads.

(....if I'm going to do this act, there's an idea that there's going to be pain. So we'd rather have the misery.)

How do you spell threat? We had a little drawing yesterday of a three-headed person. This is his spinal cord. Here's one head, here is a head, (that one's asleep), and this one over here is laying his not "I" bit out.

B-head said, "You should go to work." This B-head over here is the "should". And somebody came along and offers a suggestion to you so that A head wakes up and says "Goof off tomorrow." Now the chooser says to X to give that A head the nod to go ahead and you goof off. The B-head begins to threaten you with all sorts of impending doom because it says "You really goofed off, you gave that durn A head over there the nod, and you're going to go off and play around and goof off". So that's where the threatening feeling comes. The "threat" says you are going to get yourself in REAL trouble. It threatens you and gets you fearful. After you're threatened, you experience fear.

If somebody comes along and threatens you by saying "I'm going to beat you up at 6:00", you're gonna have a certain fear of the impending doom that's coming up on you as it nears 6:00 pm. That's where the emotions come from, you see.

Now the moment you go against this A head, this B head will also make you feel threatened. Now if the chooser tells X to give the B head the nod and says "Well, get on the ball and get to work." This A head will come up and make you feel sorry for yourself. That's B head's act. "All you ever get to do is work." "Other people can take off and go sailing in the afternoon." "Other people can take off and go down and philosophize and what-have-you, but I don't ever get to do anything I want to do, I just got to keep my nose to the grindstone to keep this thing barely going." So this one will give you self-pity. There are threats from each one if they don't get the nod; but if you go with one, the by-product is self pity; and if you give the other head the nod, you experience guilt

Now that's the way the three heads work; and practically everybody in the world has those three heads going. We're talking about that when you have a single purpose, you have a purpose of your own--this head sloughs off, and this head sloughs off. Now there is one person, a union of purpose and will--just one, and that's this head.

Now as long as there is not a consciously known, consciously chosen purpose; they're is going to be three heads in there. Remember reading books that talks about three-brained creatures. It's perfectly easy to slough off those two because they're not real brains; they're kind of warty brains--they're brain warts. And I have found I can give a nickel for a wart and it will go away. I can go give a kid a nickel for his warts and they're gone in a few days.

So I'd be happy to give everybody a dollar apiece for their warty brains. So you each get two bucks apiece if you won't think so much of them or you don't go and raise more warts. We've been letting the warts run the whole show. That right?

I think this is very valuable to look at--the three brained or three headed beings which are freaks. But they both will threaten and the poor I, the chooser, sits in here in constant conflict.All he gets to do is to choose is which one of these hypnotists, or these powerful salesmen over here, will manipulate him, ok? So this one says I'd like to go to Newport Beach today, and this one says "You better stay at home and take care of work, cause you're in a tough spot anyway." So then comes along another ally and says "Let's goof off today." So we decide to do it that way; and this one comes up and threatens every horror under the sun. It says you'll have all this trouble and the business will go down the tube, and people will steal from you and no telling what all will happen. So you get fear of the impending doom. That's the way it works. It's relatively, extremely simple--but we don't recognize these two heads as not being me. We think they're really me. We think "I'm thinking that"--but I'm not. They'll go away very easily if you have a single purpose. When purpose and will are in union, they disappear.

At certain times during the day they're not there--they're not functioning. They're not functioning when you decide to go get a glass of water--unless you've read somewhere that the water is full of carcinogens and so you better leave that off. Say you decide to make a long-distance phone call. This one says, "Make a phone call", and that one says, "You better watch it, the phone bill's high already this month." Or you go get something to eat and you go to the market and see a pretty steak. You'd like to have it, but it's $3.89 a pound or some such thing. Over here is chicken that's $1.39 a pound. So you want steak, but this one says, "You'd better take the chicken, it's cheaper and you're running short of money." If you decide I'm gonna have my steak, this one will begin to threaten you. This is over the simplest, minutest of things as well as the big ones. As far as they're concerned there is no big or little thing--nor more valuable or less valuable. There's a constant competition between these two. They live in the same house, but they're constantly competing. And I believe I read in a book somewhere that a house divided against itself is bound to fall. And I think that's why you see so many falling people around. And I'm not talking about just falling and skinning their knee--they end the show; because it is a house divided against itself.

Now when we get these three heads, this house is divided against itself. Now as far as I'm concerned, all the work that I do--and I do put a few hours in every day as any of you around me know--my job is to cease houses being divided against themselves. If I work with you on any level about anything that's related to the teaching work, my sole effort is to end the house being divided against itself because as long as that house is divided against itself, it is deteriorating, falling, coming unglued, whatever--disintegration is taking place. As soon as the disintegration is ended, integration is.

One person that I know very well, told me that you never work at being integrated; you end disintegration--when you do that, the only thing left is integration. So you don't have to work at that; all you have to do is get rid of the two warts.

(I think you said that you never get rid of the warts, you just end placing value on what they say.)

That's the first way of starting on them; but I think you eliminate the warts when you have made a single purpose. Then they are totally inactivated. In other words, it would be like there's three tape recorders down here and I push two of them off. If they're there, so what, they're not talking to you. So there's no way you can get rid of them, but you CAN ignore them. Now I've seen people trying to make these not I's or heads or warts go away. They reason with them, try to make peace with them and all that kind of stuff, but the warts (not I's) like to catch you in that kind of stuff. Forget it--ignore them. Make your own purpose and will--if you do that, you'll never hear them. They completely atrophy. And anything that's atrophied is not going to cause you any difficulty.

(About the person with the chicken or the steak. The person is going to have to decide what he's going to eat. Does he actually say I see what they are saying?)

No, both of them are gone. He says, "We're going to have filet mignon tonight, so what."

(So he says, I hear A and I hear B and I know it doesn't make any difference, so I can do what I want. I think I'll go with A today.)

No that's just activating the stupid thing again. It says "I'm going to do it and to hell with those guys."

(But that's the only advice he's getting at the moment.)

He doesn't need any advice--let's do it on my own. I'll be responsible. So I spent my money for filet, so what?

(So enjoy filet.)

Damn right.

(Buy two.)

Ok, I'll buy two. I'll even cook it for you.

He's eliminating listening to these. As long as I say "Well, I'm going with A." A says, "I got 'em." This one will still holler at you for having done it, even though you say I know what he (A-side) said and what the (B-side) said. I'm talking about putting absolutely no value on it. I'm going to chose on my own which one I'm going to have. In other words, I'm going to stand back look at the counter and see which one X says will fit best in the tummy tonight. It tells you what you're hungry for. Why listen to those guys concerned with price, I want to hear what X says. Real being says that would fit best tonight--that's the only way I know what to eat, is what sounds good tonight.

I'm not doing it intellectually, I'm letting the body say what's for the body today, ok? Intellect would be going by education or suggestion.

On the picture of man, X is up here and awareness is here, and here's the rest of the body. Awareness asks, "What are we going to eat tonight," regardless of price or anything else. X will usually tell me, the body could use a little steak tonight and a little of this that, or other. It will even tell me how to cook it.

(Assuming that the body doesn't really need one or the other.)

Then it wouldn't make any particular difference. We're not asking what, I'm listening to what it would like. It's a very dear friend of mine. I'd like to know what it would like for the body, and it's the only one who knows what nourishment it needs. So I'm not going by taste alone, I'm seeing how I feel. Usually before I go to the store, X has already said what it would like, unless I'm not hungry at all. I don't like to go to the grocery store unless I'm hungry, then it says get that, get that. I've learned by long years of experience that it's much better to let X say what I should eat rather than a suggestion from anything else.

(Sometimes it is strange combinations together.)

I was hungry last night when we finished in here and I knew exactly what I wanted. It was already telling me all about it. It was very simple, but I went and got it, and it settled the hunger very very nicely. Took care of the whole show.

(What about when you're responsible for what others are going to eat. You know what you want and can go buy it--maybe it's not what the rest of the family wants.)

Well, feed them anything. If they tell you specifically, you can get something else. Nothing wrong with cooking two different things for dinner. Having run restaurants for years, I don't care if there's 18 different things on the menu. Comes out just as easy to cook for one as it does for 100.

(What I hear is one say, "I know you like that, but what about the old man." And another one says, "But what about if the daughter comes home--she doesn't like split-pea soup.")

Now I think that the only thing worthwhile is when we become one instead of a 3-brained creature. When we recognize these are not "I's", we become single-brained, believe it or not.

When Neil was in his conflict this morning, and he thought he had to go to work today. He didn't know that was a not "i" laying it on him. Now that's when you're three-brained. This head here came up and said, "I'll be all right to take off." A-side had an ally got in there and said "Well, let's goof off today." Then this B-side not i began to threaten the impending doom; and he thought that all of this decision-making was much of himself, and it wasn't. Now the minute he recognizes a not "i" for what a not "i" does. (and this one is a not "i" for what it is). At least at that moment he is single-brained, even though those other two not i's are hollering at him from the sidelines.

(If someone calls you and says "Let's go to the beach." Now does the integrated person even consider, or do they know what they're going to do?)

I know exactly what I'm going to do. I'm going to work because I've already made a commitment regardless of the other people asking to do something else. Say that I was just sittin' and it didn't matter one way or the other. I would probably respond spontaneously, "Let's go to the beach." But if I had already said I was going to do something or whatever, I would do the commitment.

(There wouldn't be any banter.)

There is a point in existence that there is no decisions to make, no choices to make. It's always a choiceless bit. You're aware of it and you do it. The agony of choice can end. When it ends then one lives rather freely. The by-product of being single-minded is the end of this choice making. It's choiceless awareness. There it is and you just do it. If I had made any commitments anywhere (like if I had made four appointments); and somebody said "Lets go to the beach; "No, not until I get the appointments done, anyway." Not until I've taken care of what I said I was going to do. I consider that being considerate. When I'm not inconveniencing anybody, then let's go to the beach.

(There's a gap in there between taking charge and being choiceless I'd like to cover.)

I don't see it. It's a non-existent gap.

(You've been telling us we have to take charge.)

I never said you had to do anything. I never tell anybody they have to do anything. I said that's the only way a person can really function is to take charge. The end result is another word for freedom. Choiceless is because you're seeing clearly enough from here [I don't know what "here" is, he must have been pointing to awareness on the picture of man……..Marsha] there is no choice.

(I'm being in charge of choice)

You're in charge of you, your inner state; but not lettin' these heads be in charge. They make choices necessary. That right Neil? That's what you had to do this morning. When they are not there, you look at something and you see what you're going to do. I truthfully don't fiddle around with choices. I look at something and it's clear enough, that's what I'm going to do.

(Choicelessness occurs when the valuing is done.)

Right. And when the valuing is done, you've already made your purpose and your will is going with it, and you see clearly.

Once you allow yourself to be caught looking this way [A-side or B-side conditioning], you're seeing with one head and then another head. Now you've thrown yourself into the agony of choice. Then you either "feel sorry for yourself" or "feel guilty"--threatening with impending doom which is what guilt is.

So then there's the constant choice. If you have wiped off the other two heads and you have one purpose and a will to go with it, then whenever anything happens, you see it, and you see it clearly, and that's what you do. Say you were on your way to see the Christ child and you found a sick old man lying by the roadside burning up with fever--to hell with going to see the Christ child--get this sick old man on the way.

Did you ever read the story of the fourth wise man? There's no choices made. He didn't ever have to make a choice. It's called the "The Fourth Wise Man". You heard about the three wise men who got there. This is the one that didn't get there because he went piddling around doing all sorts of other things--choicelessly. So he started out to see the Christ child; but as he traveled, he came across certain difficulties; and he stopped and took care of each one as it came by, there was no choice for him. There it is--do it. It's in front of you to do, so you did it. Every time he got on his way something happened. He got to Bethlehem but quite a while after the Christ child had left.

So then he headed to Egypt, but always he ran across some joker who was doing something, or some girl was being sold into slavery. So he took valuables out of his pocket that was intended to be the gift for the Christ child and bought the girl to set her free, etc. etc. etc. But he was the only wise man who was "one within" when it was all said and done. I think it is a very delightful story. It's called the Fourth Wise Man. It's a little book, fine--if it's a thick book, I leave it where it is.

(You just start seeing things and if it's of value then you just.......)

If it's near your purpose, you'll do it; if it's not for your purpose, you don't even bother with it. It's just not there. Don't try to figure out what it would be like as long as you're still doing it. You're busy making choices, Neil, so really work at it.

(When I was trying to make the choice between work or.....)

That guy (not I) was still threatening you no matter what. And the other one (not I) would have made you feel sorry for yourself if you gave him the nod--he would have been poking at you with a little pain all day; but it's just a little pain and who cares. I'm a big boy now, I don't have to fuss about every little pain that comes along. When I was a baby, I cried about them all. I'm not a baby or child anymore; and so who am I that I shouldn't have any pain. I live in this world like everybody else.

(That's the whole idea. It's ok to be in pain.)

I'm free to experience pain--if that's what it is. And about the time you're really free to experience it, truly experience it freely, it's long gone over the hill. As long as it can intimidate you, it will. But I can be perfectly free to experience pain, I don't care what it is, a burn or anything else.

That's what you have a head for is to remember. Remember that you're a big boy now. It's ok to have a little pain.