School Talk 28 - The Transformed Being
Today we’re going to talk about transformation. Now transformation doesn’t mean a little this and a little of that, a little improvement here and there or anything of the sort. A transformation says you have changed from being one thing into being something entirely different or a total transformation is being a totally different person—might even say a different type of person.
So, of course, the usual type of person that we all started out in the world with was being conditioned. We were firmly conditioned; therefore, a stimuli-response mechanism—you might say mechanical. Somebody comes along and says some type of word, we laugh, another set of words and we feel real nice because we’re treated in a certain way. Then somebody else says something we think is derogatory and we crash. We “fall to pieces”, we are devastated. I believe that is one of the good words that are used. We suddenly are just all to pieces.
Now I think most everybody’s had that, one minute you’re feeling fine and then some event comes along, or somebody says something we don’t like, and all of a sudden one feels miserable, is that somewhere close to right?
In other words we start out in the world as a person who has no control over their own inner state of being. So we are at the mercy of the environment, the people around us and the things around us, and so we are totally a stimuli-response mechanism.
We’re in about the same position that a car would be sitting out here in the parking lot and somebody drove into it or some car backed into it--that makes a big old dent in it or knocks a hole in it. Well, we have those things happen to us.
Frequently we use the term when we’re talking that “individuals are mechanical” and this is what we mean by the person is mechanical. They are not in charge, not in things that are self determined, but something that is other determined about time, place and circumstances. For this one, whatever’s going on, or determines what’s going to happen determines how the person is going to feel. Now the transformed individual is one who would be totally in charge of their own inner state of being. They would be in charge of what they are going to do--how they’re going to feel--how their going to act. In other words, you might say that the transformed individual would be a person who could play any role they so choose to play, and they play that role consciously.
Now the human being is potentially a non-specialized creature. We’re designed to be non-specialized. We’re not able to smell like the dog, and we’re not able to fly like the bird, and we’re not able to run like the deer and a jillion other specializations. There is nothing that we’re totally specialized in. Well, we do have an unusual mental apparatus as a brain, and we also have the ability to have abstract ideas and act upon them.
So when we begin to be a mechanical type of individual, we are much like a domesticated animal would be. You whistle to the dog and he comes running. You say another word and he hunches down and puts his tail between his legs and runs because whenever he responds mechanically, we call that a well-trained dog--perhaps we have a horse that would do that, so it’s a well-trained horse. So it’s a well trained cat or whatever animal it may be. I saw on TV one day, a man had trained an American buffalo, a bison, and he had him well conditioned so that he’d do everything. Well, of course, that looks pretty good and that’s fine if you’re going to domesticate animals, but we hope we’re not domesticated.
But basically the way each of us was brought up was to be domesticated—is that somewhere’s close to right? You’re parents tried to domesticate you so that you wouldn’t embarrass them. That was their major interest, so that you wouldn’t embarrass them. So they wanted you to be good, good, good. But the transformed individual has done some studying and looked within themselves so that they are no longer carried away with conditioning.
Now they have seen the conditioned ideas and eliminated them because they see that those mechanical reactions and conditioning are not to their advantage.
Now people tell me it’s very hard to get rid of conditioning of “not i’s”. I maintain that it is not hard if we merely look at this conditioning and say “This is not to my advantage to have this foolishness around here--I’m not going to have it.”
Now you may not keep them from coming up and trying to say a word to convince you of their lies, but when you see what they are, you don’t have to be controlled by them. You simply see this is something I’m not going to be controlled by anymore. An example would be if I was sitting in front of a TV set and the announcer said, “Don’t touch that dial.” You’ve also heard that on the radio. “Don’t touch the dial; we’ll be right back after these short messages”. Well, that message goes on for the next 20 minutes. I don’t have to be controlled by that. Neither do I have to be controlled because a not “i” comes up in my head and says something.
Now I get calls all the time, “Well, the not ‘i’s’ have been annoying me today or the not “i’s” are telling me so and so and the caller is accepting that--accepting what the not “i’s” say is true. I don’t know how you get with that kind of thinking. A lot of people accept the not “i’s” as a “buddy” telling them the truth. They accept that the not i’ is in some way a magical psychic that knows the future and tells them all about it. You ever have the not “i’s” tell you they know the future.
Do you accept it or do you say, Psst--nobody knows the future—even if they charge $50. for an interview, they still don’t know the future. It’s just THEY DON’T KNOW IT!—because the future is determines by so many things of what we might do.
If you believe that something or someone knows the future, you, then, have to believe that all your life is already on a photographic strip like a movie, and it’s permanently in the can and it’s going to be run off and that’s the pm;u way it’s gonna happen.
Now if that be the case, we’re wasting our time by doing anything because it is already on the movie strip--that we’d be here today at this particular time, and that the next things gonna happen just like the movie says So obviously our life is not that programmed. We do have some free agency. Now basically, somebody can give you a suggestion and you act upon it--it looks like they know the future. To me it only looks like they were fairly good suggesters, and you were fairly suggestible. That’s how it looks. It doesn’t inform us that somebody has any unusual powers because anybody can make a suggestion.
So the transformed individual doesn’t act upon other people’s suggestions. It listens to them, it’s polite about it, but it says “Wait a minute, I’m not buying that one--especially if it’s one of those that’s going to be obnoxious. One will say, “I can make my own suggestions and do that which I would like to do. One can be interested in the things one is interested in, and not do what the suggestion had to say.
So the transformed individual does not turn their lives over to an institution, anyone, or anything else. The transformed individual is aware of what they are. They’re aware of where they are, they’re aware of what’s going on around them, all without any condemning or justifying in any case. They’re not finding fault with what’s going on around them. It’s there—may and may not fit my taste, but it apparently fits somebody else’s taste, and I’m quite sure that my taste is not the standard for the world, but neither do I think yours is. So when somebody’s behaving or living totally different than something that would fit my taste, it doesn’t mean it’s bad, wrong, ugly, abnormal, or out--it just means it doesn’t agree with my taste. I don’t have to go along with it, but neither do I find any reason to be upset with their taste.
I notice people have different taste in their entertainment and they have different taste in their music. They have different taste in their food--they have different taste in their clothing--they have different taste in their transportation--they have different taste in about any conceivable thing you can think of, but because somebody or great groups of people or practically everybody in the world but me has a different taste, that’s all right for them. I just don’t want to go along with it—I’ll stick with my own.
The conditioned individual is very apt to feel that if their taste doesn’t agree with everybody else’s, that either everybody else is wrong or that they are. Now according to which way you are conditioned, one way is to look down on those other jerks and that they are terrible—that’s all there is to it. Some people have been conditioned that if they are not conditioned like everybody else that they must be inferior, or that there is something terribly wrong with them. So they think there’s something wrong with them. I have both of them come to me. One says how am I going to straighten these others out, and the other says how am I going to make myself be like everybody else. I don’t help in either case. I’m not involved in that one.
So the transformed individual knows that his or her taste is perfect for me--that person--and it doesn’t matter about anybody else. They also assume that everybody else’s taste is just fine for that individual. So what, that’s the way it wants to go. Thank goodness there is different taste in things.
If you go out here on the street, you’ll see that people have different taste in automobiles. If you stand on any corner and watch people walk, you see that there is different tastes in people’s clothing. Now if you go in a grocery store and see what people buy, you’ll see that there’s different taste in food. You go in a restaurant and you see there’s different taste—everybody orders different--even the restaurant owner knows that so he puts a menu out with a few different things on it.
So the transformed individual is at peace, is happy in wherever the case may be. They aren’t upset by other people’s taste, and they aren’t upset because their taste is different from everybody else. For instance, they’re quite pleased to be that way. They like to live in different surroundings; they like to live in different areas. I know people who like to live in a very cold country—that doesn’t fit my taste. I don’t like to live in very cold country. I know people who like to live in swamp lands--that doesn’t appeal to my taste either, but I can certainly appreciate why they want to live there—that’s their business.
Now by the same token, we find in all kinds of behaviors an interest that people have that most individuals feel that if they’re interested in something, you should be or else there’s a little something wrong with you. Now I happen to be interested in the inner development of man and into a fully integrated, fully completed individual that can actualize their potential. I don’t see any reason why everybody else should be interested in it—there’s quite a few that are, but there is millions more of them that aren’t. I don’t look down on those people because there’s something else they’re doing--maybe they don’t need it.
With me it was a matter of life and death, so I needed it; therefore, I became very interested in it; and as best as I can see, I’ll always be interested in it; but I can see why a lot of people are not interested in it. I don’t look down on people because they’re not interested in it. They have no reason to unless they find some need for it—maybe they’re quite contented or pleased with the state they’re in which I wouldn’t want to be in--but again, that’s not my taste. So they happen to want to be that way.
So the transformed individual is not trying to be a missionary to make everybody fit their standards. They’re not trying to change anybody, they’re not trying to change the world, they don’t feel they’re out to save the world because as far as they’re concerned, the world is getting along fine. There’s a big party going on and there is an awful lot of guests there. They’re all playing the games they want to play and so why not let them play them. If people want to play war games, let them play them. I just don’t want to play war games. Some people want to play Russian Roulette, I’ve heard. I won’t play that game either and there’s a lot of other games that go on.
So the transformed individual you could say is a free individual—truly free. They are free to…….
Now most of us have been taught to think of freedom as I’ll be free from pain. I’ll be free from poverty. I’ll be free from want. I’ll be free from frustration and the list goes on. So as long as you’re trying to be free from something, you’re not even conceiving of the idea of freedom. The transformed individual is free at all times—they’re free among other things to experience what’s going on around them at the moment—it’s going to go on anyway, you might as well do it gracefully. Free to experience what may arise in that person’s way today. That’s “what’s gonna be” so the present moment is fine with them and they’re living in it and consequently are living without conflict.
Now freedom and conflict don’t go very well together—conflict is the stage of “I want to, but I don’t want to”. In other words we have two sets of values for the same situation at a given moment. Consequently it’s impossible for a person in conflict to make up their mind singly. They will say I want to, I’m going to; but…………(and I have noticed that when you put “but” in a sentence, it cancelled out what went before it)………so you’re gonna start with something but, but the other is still back there—the conflict goes on.
So the transformed individual is an individual that has no conflict. I was “pulled up” before a group of people one time to account for my horrible teaching material because they felt people were better off if they had conflict—in that way, it made them more dependant upon the institution. I agreed with that wholeheartedly--that was fact, but that I didn’t see that it was essential for people to have conflict. They also said that people wouldn’t be good unless they were in conflict because if you have enough conflict, you try to get out. I don’t see that one either. So I can’t see any purpose for conflict other than it’s destructive. It destroys the human body. It destroys the human spirit. It destroys the human being and conflict, struggle and resistance is the human problem... The transformed individual doesn’t have problems-- they have plenty of challenges, but they’re not in conflict over that. They may work many months or years on straightening out a given situation, but they’re not in conflict over it. They know it’s there and that’s it. So let’s work on it and get things going our way as best we can. If it doesn’t, we’ll do it some other way. It’s all right. So there are plenty of challenges but no conflict There’s a decided difference between having a challenge and having a conflict. I think we have challenges every day of the week, but we have no necessity to have conflict. Everybody who comes for assistance in having a professional of any sort deal with them is because of conflict. Isn’t that about correct? Everyone they go to is for some form of conflict over some situation; and as long as there is no conflict, you really are what could be called free. You’re not struggling with an ideal of what ought to be. The ideal is nonexistent,, but there is truly a “living” and a “joy” in whatever moment that one might be.
Now I’ve talked long enough on the subject of transformation and as everybody here is somewhat of a candidate for transformation, let’s see if we have some comments and questions and challenges for a little bit. Ok? Let’s have conversation this time. The last time we met we didn’t have time for your conversation so this time I’ll give you a little extra. Ok? We’ve all been talking about transformation, being transformed, what the whole idea of transformation is for rather a long period of time. Let’s see if we got something.
(If you’re free to, then you can be free to experience a feeling of jealousy for example for a moment.)
Why sure, if you tried not to, you’d be in a mess, huh? Regina said it would be all right if one was free to experience for instance, jealousy. Sure. If you’re free to, it doesn’t hut. If you’re trying to make the feeling go away by getting the situation straightened around so you wouldn’t be jealous, you got a busy and frustrating mornings work, don’t you—or a night’s work as the case may be. Maybe it’s somebody you were trying to get rid of, but if somebody also tries to get ‘em, why you’d feel jealous anyway—have you experienced that??
Is that correct? You know its fine, you know it’s wonderful for me to reject somebody or depart from them, but it’s not for them to do it to me. But I’m free to have either one; and if you’re free to have either one, then everything goes pretty well. Ok.
(As long as you don’t resist it, then you can be free to experience it and then choose something else later)
That’s absolutely correct. So go ahead and be free to experience whatever may arise in your day today.
You see, even pain, as much as none of us likes pain--if you’re free to experience it, it hurts about one tenth of what it does if you are totally frustrated with it and are trying to make it go away. I’ve tried that on many times and it’s about one tenth as intense when one is free to experience the pain--AND it lasts about one tenth as long as it does when I’m in a total turmoil over “I gotta get rid of this right now.” There is no way I can tolerate this pain. I’ve known people that when you work in the field of working with people, you can have somewhat of the evaluation of the intensity of pain from the lesion or whatever may be present. You can’t tell exactly because everybody feels different and everybody has a different tolerance level, but you can tell pretty well. I’ve seen people absolutely throw fits over what’s bound to be a rather minor discomfort, and I’ve seen people with something that’s bound to be pretty intense pain from what the lesion was, and they said “Oh well, it’s pretty uncomfortable, but I’ll just as soon get along all right.”
I had a guy come in who had three teeth broken off with raw exposed nerves hanging out of them and he said, “Well, it’s a little uncomfortable especially if I put something hot or cold in my mouth,” and it’s bound to have been throbbing above all comprehension, but he wasn’t making very much out of it. And I’ve had other people that had the tiniest little scratch, you know, like a pin scratch on their arm and they were screaming bloody murder—so some people are very resistant to pain and some are not. So, some people have accepted it. I know one guy that says he has to watch to see when the blood pours because he doesn’t know when he’s hurt otherwise. So, he cares very little about it.
(What about if you’re very, very lonely and you can’t seem to get out of it.)
The question is if one feels lonely and you can’t seem to find anybody to relieve the loneliness at the moment--what do you do about it. I slightly paraphrased the question.
The point was yes, I’d be free to be lonely and if I’m free to be lonely, it turns out that all it is is “I’m alone”. If I’m free to be lonely, it’s only turns out I am alone which is nothing very serious. You see, I’m alone and I think everyone of us at some time or another wants to be alone for a minute or two anyway. Huh? Now maybe not any long drawn out period, but loneliness is because I am resisting being alone. Try that one on for size sometime.
(It seems like there is a disturbance for instance, we’ll say a sense or feeling of loneliness at that moment and it is disturbing to the person as myself and then shortly after that in the mind we contrive what ought to be.)
Oh yes, then comes the ideal. So first comes one fact, I’m alone. Second is that the mind says this is terrible, or some not “I” says you should have someone here—it ought be different. So you set up the ideal that nobody could fulfill and pretty soon you’re so frustrated that it’s unbelievable and you see yourself as a total victim and you’re layin’ down shedding fears of sadness and whatever else because of your horrible situation, is that right?
So if you’re alone, you’re just alone, is that all right instead of making all these wild ideals. What is, is always there and at this moment you are alone. So what? Pretty soon you can get the same person to be complaining because they don’t ever have a minute to themselves. In fact, I’ve heard both statements from you Miss Lott. If you got a whole bunch around and they’re there all the time, Linda says. “I never have a moment to myself--Can’t you get rid of these people for me. Help me get rid of them. Get them out of my life!: And then if there’s nobody there for a little bit, you say, “I’m so lonely, I’m about to fall apart at the seams.” It is really pathetic. So you see we are not free to experience whatever’s going on moment by moment and that is the present moment is the most wonderful thing there is.
There is a lovely little book which I could recommend that most everybody read—it probably takes you a good six minutes to read it even if you read slowly. It’s called “The Precious Present.” You see the word present has more than one meaning in the English language, right? I’m not going to give the whole thing away, but it does have more than one meaning, and so you could read that as whatever it is, but I would recommend that if you have an opportunity to find it, it’s a very lovely little book. It’s called “The Precious Present” and it says if you ever receive this precious present, you will be happy from henceforth and thereon. So it might be well worthwhile--if you’re interested in being happy, that is. I don’t know whether anybody’s interested in that. I think more people are interested in being proven to be the victim. I’ve had very few people contend with me about being happy, but I’ve had a lot of them to contend with me about being a victim and miserable.
So I think more people are interested in being victims, than they are being very happy. So possibly more than one realizes, there is a lot of interest in being a victim and proving it because that does relieve one of any responsibility for one’s own state. You might say that the fully transformed individual is an individual that says I am responsible for how I feel. I’m not responsible for everything that happens around me. Ok? I can’t take charge of what’s outside of me, but I can take charge of how I feel about it and how I respond. That is where the utter freedom comes in. I am totally in charge of how I will choose to see whatever is going on. I cannot choose whether it’s going to rain today or whether it’s not. I can’t choose whether a car runs through the front window or the office today or not. I can’t choose whether i’m going to meet all happy people today or I’m gonna meet a few grumps. I can’t choose all that, but I can certainly choose my response.
If you work in a place with people, you can’t choose what kind of customers are going to come in today, can you? But you can choose you’re response to them, and that is what being transformed is all about.
We’ll have another talk in about a week, ok? Have a lovely day everybody.